Essence is the first word that comes to mind when I think of what it means to be a lady.
It is an indispensable quality of “something” very attractive. The word lady reminds me of the Statue of Liberty. She is graciously welcoming. In her left hand she carries a book of laws representing rules to lives by, and in her right hand she carries a torch that illuminates for all to see her absolute awareness of who she is. She sets an example for other women to follow. A brief description of today’s lady is a blend of past and present. She can wear pearls and smash glass ceilings. She can be fierce in her kitchen or the CEO in her boardroom. She is always polite but no longer apologizes for her opinions. She is a hostess in the evening and a professor of economics during the day. In other words, darlings, a woman’s place in society has progressed, but the characteristics of a lady are the same today as they have been from the beginning of time.
A Mother, Peer and Grandmother
A lady fits into a specific category. She can call herself fierce for smashing the glass ceiling but without inner substance she cannot call herself a lady. A lady has a fine set of principles that set her apart from other women.
As women over 50 we know a lady when we meet her. As I mentioned above there is “something” very attractive about her. Even before her peers, her mother was her teacher. I believe a grandmother has a role to play, too.
Defining Principles of a Lady
- A Lady is never defined by what she has. She is defined by who she is.
- She is passionate in her beliefs of what is right and wrong.
- She is courteous, not curt.
- She is warm, never aloof
- She shows empathy.
- She is a woman of her word.
- She knows who she is.
- She has impeccable manners.
- She is soft, not tough.
- She showers love, not scorn.
- She is a good listener.
- She is respectful.
- She is thoughtful.
- She treats everyone equally.
- She says please, thank you and no thank you.
- She is genuine, she does not wear a mask.
- She is steadfast in her values.
Friendships Should Be Blendships
A woman over 50 should take pride in her circle of other women. It is never too late to make a shift if the women you spend time with don’t measure up to your expectations. There are a few shifts I am contemplating. I don’t enjoy women who are “planners and plotters.” This type of woman is not a lady. I see through them and don’t like the feeling I have when I am around them. I enjoy the real McCoy, darlings. These are secure women. These are ladies. You should have women in your life whose common denominators are values and kindness.
A Grandmother’s Gift
We are all products of our upbringing. As grandmothers we have an opportunity to “leave our granddaughters’ information in their heads.” Educate them in the importance of being a woman of quality … a lady. A lady has the finest of principles that set her apart from other women. She will be confident, courteous, honorable, kind-hearted and loving. Her ladylike manner, her inner beauty, will radiate to all she meets. She will be a woman of substance, wearing pearls of wisdom passed down from her mother and grandmother — as she smashes through that glass ceiling.
A woman is not a lady because she comes from a superior social position or earns a large income. A lady today demonstrates who she is. Her posture is regal, her values are clear, and she know exactly who she is. She is the Statue of Liberty, welcoming all ladies, of every background, into her life. She wears pearls of wisdom.
Darlings! I’ll be in your neighborhood.
Meet me at the Lady Expo, tomorrow April 27th (9am-1pm) in Chicago, and obtain a signed copy of my journal Stories for My Grandchild (just in time for Mother’s Day).
You cannot buy class.
A lady is not defined by what she has. First and foremost, if she is not kind, she is not a lady. Some women pretend they are nice, but a real lady knows when they are not. They have deep-seated agendas. Fortunately, there are wonderful women out there who have the following characteristics.
The lady of today has no rules save a few that in my opinion go to the beginning of time. If she is lacking in the area I am about to discuss … she was not, is not and will never be a lady.