Five Ways to Make New Friendships After 50February 9, 2018
There is every reason to believe a woman’s lifestyle after 50 improves.
I know 50% of you are smiling and nodding your head in agreement, while the other 50% of you may continue asking yourself, “how so?” Some of you may have the ability to create a freshness and newness to your lifestyle after 50; you are vibrant and happy. On the other hand, others may be shy or have a problem adapting or can’t pull yourself out of a rut. The reassuring fact is that for those of you having trouble adapting to life after 50, there are lots of other women who share your feelings, which means you already have an immediate bond. Women need other women, and women need friendship, especially after 50. So reach out to others; I know you will be welcomed.
Why We Need Friendships After 50
We are all empty nesters and want companionship. Some of us have retired from long careers, leaving old friends behind and seeking new friendships. Some of us are bored; feeling a lack of purpose and need friends to help us find a new path. Many of us have moved to a new community, leaving old friends behind and seeking new women to spend time with. Some of us are suddenly widowed or divorced, and loneliness is simply not an option. And furthermore, some of us find we have outgrown friendships; no longer having much in common with old friends and looking to meet new women instead. No matter what your circumstances, all of us have one thing in common: we want to live a happy, loving and productive life after 50.
5 Ways to Make Friends After 50
- JOIN GROUPS WHERE YOUR PASSIONS LIE. This is where you will meet ‘kindred spirits.’
- REFLECT ON QUALITIES YOU NEED IN A FRIEND. Choose a person you enjoy who is genuine, shares your values, and has a passion for living life to its fullest.
- ASK YOURSELF: WHAT TYPE OF FRIEND WILL YOU BE? This is potentially the most important question. Are you capable of being a worthy friend?
- GET A LIFE! Admit you are lonely. Force yourself to connect with women who inspire you.
- OPEN YOURSELF TO PEOPLE FROM ALL TYPES OF BACKGROUNDS. Breathe in new knowledge with interesting people from all walks of life. In time, you will develop interesting friendships that will inspire you to give back.
Please darlings, feel free to add to my list of five.
How I Feel as a Woman About Friendship After 50
As I reflect back on my list, I think number three is the most important of the five. “Am I qualified to be a good friend?” I know I am a worthy friend, but I also know all close friendships have to be nurtured, and I can’t help but wonder, ‘Do I have enough time to cater to the many women I genuinely admire and care for?’
I have friendships that I have had for years, all over the world. I wish some of the women lived next door to me in my apartment in the sky, in Chicago. The rest I wish I could go on a journey to visit on occasion in order to check up on them to know all is well. I have genuine feelings for these women.
As a woman well over 50, I don’t require a lot of friends but I do require that my friends are genuine and that they have personal depth because I see right through shallowness. I love meeting women with substance from all walks of life, and I have actually made four new friends in the past year and a half. I have also walked away from women in my life who showed a side of themselves that I no longer felt was important to surround myself with.
I understand what I need in friendships because I am a woman over 50 who has traveled down many roads that led me to a place where I am firmly grounded in who I am. I say what I mean, and I mean what I say. I need and cherish my girlfriends. I know how to be a good friend. I know what to look for in ‘my’ good friend. I know the organizations I would join to meet new friends. I know if I were ever lonely I would force myself to reconnect.
I am excited to form some more lasting friendships over the coming years; more this time around shared viewpoints such as business, politics and art. Friendships with women who give me a ‘buzz.’ Friendships with women I deeply admire.
I will continue to use my five step program to screen women who may become new friends and to screen myself to make certain I can give what it takes to form long-lasting friendships after 50.