How to Stop Living in the Past

I truly do not know how to live in the past, save for my loving and happy memories, and the lessons I learned along the way. I review these in my mind now and then. Other than that, I have no time to waste in the past. Do you? If so, this is how to stop living in the past and embrace your age and stage of life…

Start by building a life that excites you. As a woman with verve, I can tell you that I am filled to the brim with my daily life. As I often say, “I live a razzle, dazzle lifestyle and I adore it!”

And, yes, I get frazzled, too. However, on hectic days I tell myself, “Better to be frazzled than sitting around thinking about what was.”

There is a Reason Some People Live in the Past

The reason you might live in the past is very simple: You are lost. You lack motivation. And you don’t know how to make daily goals or even dreams. So, you revert to your memories and tell stories about what was.

Or, you sit and daydream about this, that, and the other. Or, perhaps you feel sorry for yourself asking, “Why can’t the present be like my past?”  Your present can be better than the “good ‘ole days,” but you must have a plan like you did the first half of your life.

“Stop living in the past because your life is not over yet! You have so much more to see, do, and even become.” — Honey Good

In the first half of your life, your plan was laid out. You went to school, met a guy, got married, possibly had a career, had a family, bought a home, raised your children, did volunteering, and now… what is the plan? What is your purpose?

I have a plan that can change everything for you — stop living in the past because your life is not over yet! You have so much more to see, do, and even become.

Take These Steps To Start by Embracing Your Age and Stage in Life

You must say to yourself, “I am not over the hill. I have time to climb a new hill. Therefore, I will not waste my time or energy living in my past, wishing I could turn back the time. Instead, I will look eagerly with some natural trepidation to the future.”

Embracing your age is about understanding that you are in a better place now than you ever have been. You understand yourself better, which means that you are better equipped to live the exact life that you want and deserve.

Here are the five ways I did not allow my past to become my present:

1. Stay in the Present: I became motivated to live in the present and not dwell on what once was by designing a new plan for this stage of my life. This is what my plan became.

2. Find a New Life Purpose: I emotionally and physically felt the need to find a new purpose in life. I wanted to feel passionate about a project, a project that was mine.

3. Thrive as a Cancer Survivor: I had been ill, surviving cancer, and so I decided I would discipline myself to eat healthfully and workout (I started boxing on the advice of a 90 year old woman!). This was vital.

4. Stay Connected: I am a loner, and yet I enjoy people. Darling, I know it seems contradictory, so I decided I wanted to stay connected with special like-minded women who I call girlfriends. This is something I do in person (though less these days) and online with my private Facebook groups.

Another promise I made to myself was to stay connected with my scattered family living in seven different states. I would try and be the best mother and grandmother I can be. I would be a role model for the rest of my life.

5. Not Repeat the Past: And lastly, I would not do what I did in the past. A new chapter awaited me.

That was my plan, and I am fulfilling all five of my goals. It was not easy. Nothing that has real meaning is easy.

THE IMPORTANCE OF PURPOSE AND FEELING JOY

5 Signs You Are Stuck in the Past

I know a person who lives in the past. It is one of my meaningful relationships. So, I am extremely aware of the pitfalls. If you have any of these signs, I think you are suffering from an addiction to what was… your past. Here are the signs.

First, you constantly tell stories about your past. Second, you don’t plan for a better today. Also, you have very few, if any, relationships with interesting people. Next, you are sure your future will never reach the pinnacle of your past.

You feel you have peaked. Finally, you are stuck. Not a good excuse! You have given up and decided to live in the past.

Take my advice and approach your 50s, 60s, 70s, 80s and beyond with discipline because nothing good in life happens by accident. You have to make a plan and then work your plan.

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Plan To Embrace Every Moment!

I am a proponent of keeping a personal journal for three months. This is a great start in forming your plan. You are expressing your thoughts, and you are enforcing self-discipline; a discipline you will surely need as you seek an interesting purpose in your life.

When a friend suggested that I journal daily for three months, when I told her I felt stuck, I never would have guessed the transformation that would occur in my life. I found my voice! I never missed a day of journaling, even though my husband and I were traveling at the time. I wrote on airplanes, hotel rooms, automobiles, and in several different countries. I did not miss a day.

Through journaling, I found a new purpose and passion in honeygood.com, in the community that we have now built, and it led to me writing my book. Now, I have no time to live in the past because the present is a frantic, fun whirlwind of friends and new experiences. I live in the present and await tomorrow with enthusiasm. This present-day mindset has become my greatest gift.

Do you live in the past? Why do you think that is? Or if you don’t, how do you think that you have managed to move on? Let’s chat about it in the comments below! (I also answer every comment personally.)

 

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