Darling, let me begin by saying this: the high road is not the easy road, but it is the only road if you want to live in peace with yourself.

Over the years, I’ve come to understand that taking the high road means doing the right thing, even when it’s uncomfortable, lonely or even when it means letting go. With age has come wisdom, and with wisdom, a gentle reminder, “To thine own self be true.” That, my darling, is the ultimate form of self care.

A Lesson from My Father

My father was a man of few words but infinite wisdom. His quiet philosophy? “Take the high road.” He taught by example and chose kindness over ego and grace over pride. He wanted his children and grandchildren to walk through life proud of their choices.

When I falter, I think of him. When I’m unsure, I ask myself: Would my father be proud of the woman I am today? More often than not, that thought alone sets me straight.

When Life Tests Your Values

Every woman (yes, every single one of us) has been tested by circumstances that made us pause and consider:

• Do I stand up or stay silent? 
• Do I retaliate or release? 
• Do I stoop to the level of another or rise above?

I have learned through trial and error (mostly error, if I’m being honest!) that the high road will always reward you with something the low road never can: dignity. There is no greater gift you can give yourself than knowing, deep down, that you upheld your values. That you walked away, not with bitterness, but with grace.

Even when the roof felt like it was caving in, even when my heart was cracking down the middle, if I stayed true to my principles, I felt a subtle but powerful shift within me. My self-respect grew. With that, my peace returned.

Setting Boundaries with Grace

Taking the high road does not mean allowing others to trample your spirit or compromise your worth. No, darling. That’s not the lesson here.

You can take the high road and set firm boundaries. You can forgive someone who doesn’t deserve it, not for their sake, but for your own, and still walk away. You can exit a toxic relationship with dignity. It’s all in how you do it.

Taking the high road is never about being a doormat. It’s about choosing your own wellbeing over vengeance. That is authentic self care and an act of self-respect.

When I Let Go of a Friendship

This past year, I found myself at a crossroads with a woman who once told me she loved me like a sister. Over time though, her actions didn’t match her words. I began to feel unsettled in her presence. The relationship no longer felt mutual. It felt heavy and off. For months, I wallowed in indecision. Then she crossed a line and although it was subtle, it was unmistakable. That is when I knew it was time to walk away.

When she invited me and my Ultimate Concierge to dinner, I replied simply: “We’re not available.” When she asked again, I texted, “I’ll get back to you when we’re free.” And, darling, I never did.

She got the message. I ended that relationship on my terms with my integrity intact. I simply walked away without drama, cruelty, and without compromising who I am. That, my dear reader, is the high road.

A New Kind of High Road

Earlier this week, I made a completely different kind of high road decision. I extended kindness toward someone who did not deserve my goodness. Not by any traditional measure.

But you know what? I did it anyway because it brought me inner peace. Peace is sacred at any stage of life. My act wasn’t about them, but rather it was about me reclaiming control of my emotions. It was about letting go, without letting them win. That too, darling, is self care.

Forgiveness Is Part of the High Road

In family, I believe forgiveness is mandatory. Having productive and meaningful conversations is a must. We must try, when possible, to mend what is broken.

Outside of family, however, the high road looks different. It’s not always about reconciliation. It’s about deciding what serves your soul. Ask yourself… Will this bring me peace? Or will it reopen a wound I’ve already worked so hard to heal?

You have a choice. You can hold onto bitterness and tumble, or you can take the high road, where the view is bright and your heart can breathe again.

The Struggle of Choosing the High Road

Taking the high road isn’t always a peaceful path. It can be hard. Especially when you’re constantly met with sarcasm, manipulation, or cruelty. Sometimes you want to scream, lash out, or throw in the towel. I’ve walked both roads and I promise you, the low road always leaves you feeling worse. You don’t just end up angry at the other person… you end up angry at yourself.

I’ve lived long enough to know: there’s no rest for the soul on the low road.

I Am Fierce Because I Take the High Road

With each passing year, I’ve come to understand that true fierceness has nothing to do with raising your voice or winning the argument. It’s about choosing grace when it would be easier to choose resentment. It’s about preserving your peace when chaos comes knocking.

“I am fierce because I take the high road.”

There is nothing weak about grace and there is nothing passive about dignity. There is certainly nothing cowardly about choosing to protect your well-being over proving a point.

Why You Should Take the High Road

If you’re still wondering whether it’s worth it, let me offer you this:

• You deserve a peaceful life after 50.
• Their behavior should not dictate yours.
• Energy is sacred and yours is too precious to waste on bitterness.
• Revenge is a burden. Let them carry it.
• You will sleep better. Trust me.
  

Taking the high road means keeping your head held high, even when others don’t deserve your grace. It means leading with honor, even when no one is watching.

Final Thoughts

Darling, life will offer you many opportunities to lower your standards. Don’t take the bait. Stay true to yourself. Choose peace over pettiness, grace over grudges and self-respect over momentary satisfaction.

Take the high road, even if you walk it alone. At the end of the day, you are the one who has to live with your choices and sleep peacefully in your bed. That, my dear, is the truest form of self care. Amen.