This is your moment to embark on your story, on your personal lifestyle after 50. This is your time to take care of yourself. A time to allow yourself the opportunity to embark on personal missions and goals.

Many of you, after 50, have successfully branched out into a new world of opportunities. Some of you are still searching to find your niche. And some of you have pivoted from one calling to another, always finding that new endeavor that makes you smile.

Then there are those of you who have retreated. You are lonely and feel invisible as you continue to search for meaning in your life. If this is you, know that I am here for you. It starts with small steps that later grow into great strides. Recognize that many people over the age of 50 face similar challenges in finding friends due to social isolation. Speak to others about your experiences and you will find that you are not alone. Gathering new acquaintances and friends after 50 is a great way to expand your horizons. You will be glad to reconnect with friends and experience the fulfillment of having strong social bonds. Acknowledging birthdays as special occasions can also strengthen personal connections and lead to renewed interactions.

Men, in particular, may feel scared to approach others due to fear of rejection. Making friends can be particularly challenging, but it is essential to take proactive steps. These emotional barriers can hamper your ability to build friendships. Addressing these insecurities is crucial to encourage bonding and forming meaningful connections.

NEW HORIZONS

Life shifts are never easy. Retirement immediately stops your communication with fellow employers and co-workers. Empty nesters no longer have school committee meet-up acquaintances and carpool friends. Friendships can evolve through different life stages, including having kids. Book clubs can be a great way to make and maintain friendships. Children can influence social circles and introduce new friendships. College friendships evolve over time as people transition into different phases such as marriage and parenthood. A move to a new town is lonely unless you take personal action to reach out. My mother once facilitated a meeting with her daughter’s friend, which helped me establish new connections. A daughter can help introduce new social connections. Relocating to a new city brings an emotional journey and social dynamics of establishing connections in a fresh environment. Moving to a new country can present significant challenges in making friends, often leading to feelings of isolation.

The loss of a spouse, a divorce, illness, or a blended family. A child’s rejection and the feeling of invisibility due to aging are mountains a woman climbs after 50.

And, climb she can … to new heights as long as she invests in herself and her girlfriends.

Remember this saying, darling, “No man is an Island. No man stands alone.” Gathering new women acquaintances after 50 opens the door to conversation. Conversation leads to knowledge. Knowledge leads to new thoughts.

Joining a church can also provide a supportive community and opportunities to meet new people.

Joining community groups, including churches and classes, and interacting with neighbors is essential to foster friendships and connections. Taking a class can help form new friendships. You will find a pot of ‘answers’ through the gathering of women after 50. Oh my! Oh my!…What I have learned from other women! They have often been my godsend.

Engaging in shared interests through volunteer work and group activities is a great way to make new friends and contribute positively to one’s community. Participating in social activities, including walking, can help broaden your social network and meet new people.

PICKLE JUICE – ADVICE FROM A FRIEND

While having lunch with three friends last week, I mentioned I experienced a leg cramp. Having good friends who offer practical advice and support can greatly enhance your quality of life, especially when you reflect on how your time is spent. My girlfriend responded, “Buy pickle juice on Amazon, and your leg cramp will disappear in seconds!! Pickle juice! I had never heard of Pickle juice!! See what you can learn when you gather friends after 50? It’s also important to talk regularly to maintain these friendships, whether over the phone or through video chats, especially when meeting in person isn’t possible. Weekends are a great time to engage in social activities and maintain these friendships.

ADVICE I  LEARNED FROM FRIENDS

1. I learned from Joyce to reinvent myself every ten years and to rekindle old friendships that have spanned three decades. Her philosophy was that a woman’s lifestyle and thoughts shift in ten-year increments. I liked that! I went from motherhood to a life of leisure with girlfriends. Then fundraising for my special charities. Later becoming an entrepreneur, a world traveler, the mother and grandmother of a blended family, and so much more.
2. I became an entrepreneur in my 60’s because Gail, an author I met by chance, gave me wonderful advice. “If you keep a Journal for three months, you will find your voice.” I took her advice and look where it led me. I often wondered if I could have achieved this without her guidance. Sharing personal stories and insights about prioritizing relationships as one ages is essential for emotional well-being.
3. My best friend Barbara told me, “If you don’t expect anything from anyone, you will not be disappointed.” I suddenly felt better.
4. From Marie Kondo, I learned that a tidy home creates a tidy mind. I redid my closet, darling, and my thinking is far more organized.
5. There are several women who have taught me to live my life in chapters.
6. I learned from Joannn to ‘delight’ in details.
7. From Barbara, a Positive Psychologist, I learned that there is a degree in Positive Psychology. I love it!
8. I learned from my doctor girlfriend Jennifer to see an upset as grey, never black. This lesson is a keeper.

I have learned much from gathering women after 50 into my private Facebook community, Celebrate Life!

Putting in effort to maintain and rekindle friendships has been a recurring theme in my life, and it has brought me immense joy and fulfillment.

A FEW TIDBITS I PRACTICE

I’ve learned…

1. To listen to my heart from not listening to my heart! Inviting friends to social outings like movies or dinner can help reconnect and overcome social isolation. Being invited to various events can also deepen relationships and create lasting memories.
2. To say ‘no’ by saying yes when I should have said NO!
3. I cannot be good to others if I do not take time to care for myself.
4. I should spend time listening to myself, be aware of my feelings, and making my dreams come true.
5. And interestingly, I learned that I was a very FIERCE woman! I was given a magazine assignment titled Why I am Fierce Woman after 50. I pondered and agonized over the word fierce for two days. To me, ‘fierce’ sounded like such a negative word. I asked my girlfriends, who agreed. My pondering led to discovery. I realized the word fierce is very positive. I wrote one of my best short essays.

Engaging in fun activities with friends and balancing serious discussions with light-hearted topics based on shared interests can foster deeper connections. Meeting people with similar interests through social activities like volunteering or joining hobby groups can also help build meaningful relationships and combat social isolation. It’s also important to acknowledge that even with social interactions, some people may still feel lonely.

Here is my short essay that I wrote for Chicago Woman Magazine.

YOUR ASSIGNMENT

I am giving you an assignment.

1. Please write an essay: Why you are a fierce woman after 50. Your personal thoughts on why you are fierce will uplift your spirits. Writing it for yourself will help you reflect on your journey and form personal connections. If you feel comfortable, please share it with me here or in my private Facebook group. The women there would love to read it. Engaging in this exercise can also help you meet people who share similar experiences and interests.
2. Wear Red Lipstick! You will no longer feel invisible! People will notice you in a crowd. Other women will notice your red lips and think of you as an empowered woman. Hopefully, you will feel the other women’s vibes and feel enlightened! Discuss your experiences and share personal stories to deepen your connections with others. Open talks are essential in fostering these connections. Recently, many have found that sharing these stories can lead to renewed and deeper bonds.

Read here more on why I love to wear red lipstick!

Popular Brands:

Chanel: Pirate

Dior: 999

Revlon: Fire and Ice

WOMEN NEED WOMEN

If you read this entire blog, I know you came away with information, and Darling, you have not stepped out into the Universe.

It all comes down to this: Women need women after 50. The women in your life do not have to be your best friend. They can be acquaintances. They can be women you meet by chance who give you great advice or a tip.

Collecting all types of women of all ages in your life stops loneliness and your feeling of invisibility. And, it costs nothing! It is time you create your private authentic community, even though it is not an easy process.

My girlfriend Carolyn explained to me that relationships are an investment. Transforming your intentions into meaningful friendships is not easy. The role of a husband in social interactions and support can be significant during this process. You must make time (my biggest problem) and put yourself out into the universe, which is not easy for many busy individuals. Meaningful relationships, whether romantic or platonic, require emotional work and vulnerability. Being a wife can also influence your social connections and priorities, especially after significant life changes.

Here are 4 ways to accomplish these goals:

1. Have intention.
2. Be Authentic.
3. Show your vulnerable side.
4. Make the Time.

Engaging in volunteer work helps individuals make new friends through shared interests within their communities. Shared interests are crucial in forming new friendships, especially for those over 50.

Everyone has lonely moments. The influence of parents on social connections and friendship dynamics is also significant. Everyone at times feels invisible. The passive approach of waiting for others to include you in social groups can reflect vulnerability. When emotions begin to erode personal joy, you must take a stand by investing in yourself … because you matter. Sometimes, getting out of the house and participating in social activities can make a significant difference. Neighborhood-based interactions can facilitate networking opportunities and help individuals build meaningful relationships. Coffee shops can be great places to meet new people and form connections.

Do your homework, and don’t forget to buy the pickle juice!

Why are you a FIERCE woman after 50? I’d love to hear your take! Join the conversation in the comments below.

If you enjoyed this story, please subscribe. Social media can help you reconnect with people from your past. This includes the possibility of rekindling friendships with a high school friend. Along with my emails, I’ll also send you my free ebook about rekindling connections with old friends. It’s all about being visible, darling!

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