I'm Honey!

As a woman who has lived through many passages and learned through my larger than life experiences (positive and negative), I’ve discovered how to take a big empowering bite out of life.

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What Kind of Flower Arrangement Are You?

What kind of flower arrangement are you? 

What Kind of Flower Arrangement Are You?

A while back I was reading an interview that Brigitte Macron, the French President’s wife, gave to a French magazine. In the article, she described herself as more than a “decorative vase of flowers.” And, of course, that is true.

My immediate thought was how delightful and telling it would be to have a luncheon with my friends, and instead of playing cards after lunch, invite each of the women to try and depict her personality by painting flowers and then arranging the flowers in a vase.

The Flower Arrangement Experiment

In this experiment of mine, I would provide each woman with drawing paper, watercolors, and a paintbrush. After the experiment, everyone could frame their artwork or toss it, but how refreshing to view how each woman perceived themselves through the medium of art. I just know that each woman would have her own distinct style. How fun!

Picture this, the colors they chose, the sizes and shapes of the flowers they drew, and how they arranged the flowers in their vases, free-flowing or very conservative, are all elements which would help to tell their stories.

The container itself would be telling, too. Would they choose a clear, modern glass filled with cool water or traditional Waterford? Or possibly a lacquered vase with a design like this one?

Whatever they decided, it would be an exciting and telling art project!

I began to daydream as I thought of my list of friends and imagined what their flower arrangements would look like. Then I took my thoughts a step further. Would the women surprise me? Would they use summer colors when I felt they would use winter? Or spring colors when I was sure they would like fall? Would their arrangement be tight and exact or free-flowing? Would the size of the flowers be tiny or huge florals or a mix?

What if Their Flower Arrangement Surprised Me?

If there were a surprise with one of the women’s arrangements, I would ask myself, “Why?” Was there a changed element in her lifestyle that we had not discussed? Had I been missing something all along that took me by surprise?

If there was a change in her lifestyle, was I willing to flow along with her because she meant so much to me? Or had I all along kidded myself into believing she was what she was not?

What Does This All Mean?

My musings today are about innocently changed lifestyles that could have an adverse reaction between good friends.

I have a plan, my darlings, because women, like flower arrangements, have a distinct style. Unless an element in her lifestyle arises to change the dynamics of the friendship or something pops up that interferes with the past happy dynamics of their friendship, both women may begin to react as they never have before and think to themselves, “Where did that come from?”

Ask This Question Before Judging

Has a new element in my friend’s life developed that changed her ability to be the friend she used to be?

Enter, what I call ‘the glitch.’ If the case is due to a life change and you value the friendship, it is up to both of you to have a warm and loving discussion and figure out how to make your friendship work, with the change in her lifestyle, which has created ‘the glitch.’

honey with flower arrangement and pillow

A True Story of My Own

I will happily use myself as an example of the friend who added a new dimension to her life. At this stage of my life, I no longer have as much time to devote to my girlfriends or myself. I occasionally am late. I may cancel if I know my friend is covered, such as when I am supposed to be playing cards.

These circumstances may make my friend(s) feel I no longer care, and they may back away from me. I recognize their feelings, although nothing could be further from the truth. I have a husband who needs me and that take precedence over friendship.

Others of you may encounter other life-changing elements; you have become a grandmother, or you are downsizing and going through a move, or perhaps, like me, you find a new passion later in life and it shifts your priorities. For example, I remember before I started working, I would spend happy hours finding the perfect gifts for my girlfriends because I loved doing it. Now I spend my time writing to you!

My Answer to ‘The Glitch’

As women after 50, we have a complex tapestry of relationships. We also know not all relationships are created equally. One of my friends, who I love, gets me. She knows my lifestyle. She will call me back three times a day until she reaches me because she is secure in our friendship and also values our friendship. She knows I care and am just diverted! So she rises to the occasion; never making me feel guilty (but I am because I care) and calls.

To avoid misunderstandings, talk to your friends who make your heart sing and express your feelings with one another. Work out a solvable solution that works for both of you. They are just as special, even when there is ‘the glitch.’ Hang on tight to them, darling.

Another Example of Friendship With ‘A Glitch’

One of my favorite types of friendships goes like this: You have been friends for years, and she evaporates from your life because of family, work, illness, moving, or a hundred different things. But when you talk to one another by phone or see one another in person, there is still that fizzle! You are both lucky, darling. I call these gals best friends.

And then you have those special gal friends who you don’t care what their flower arrangement looks like. One day it can be modern, one day traditional, and one-day weeds! I have those friends, too. I love them the best.

I also have friends who are soul sisters. We love being together whenever we can. There is no element of misunderstandings in our friendship. We are spiritual clones. If you were to put forty different thoughts in a blender, some hers and others mine, we would still be spiritual clones. How lucky is that?

honey good swinging flower arrangement

Shopping for Flower Arrangements

As you are reading this story, perhaps you’re wishing for more friendships and flower arrangements. We all need more girlfriends to lean on, learn from, and love. Darling, I recommend joining my private Facebook groups which I have created for women over 50. If you’re feeling a touch of loneliness, consider this your invitation to join us and let new friendships bloom.

Come find your supportive community of like-minded women! Join these private Facebook groups:

🌻 Women over 50: Celebrate Visibility

🌼Sisters in Widowhood: Life Transition

🌷 Estranged Mothers and Grandmothers: Millions Strong

My Flower Arrangement

Are you wondering what my flower arrangement would look like? That is easy, darling. My flowers would be freestyle, large, and blooming in a clear glass vase with clear water. Mine would be colorful. I am Winter, Spring, and Summer. I am not Fall.

What would your arrangement look like? Please share your thoughts either in the comments below. I would love to hear from you!

Remember to join my private Facebook group created for women like you!

April 17, 2024

Home, Relationships

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  1. Sandrala says:

    Honey, We are enjoying world-famous Tulip Festival in Skagit Valley. Just had good friends from 55 yrs. ago visit from Tucson & Oslo …. What a gift!! Will paint some flowers again. Thank you for inspiration!!

  2. patricia nisenholz says:

    I am FALL.. SPRING..SUMMER… I am the SUN.. NOT CLOUD(s) NOT rain EVER!
    I LOVE fleurs~ but NEVER red roses or glads.. some days I am a mixture.. lots of days just plain white. And ONLY a clear vase. And I am that friend that can disappear from view to go within. Trying to break that .. not one of my strengths. ‘Happy Wednesday.

    • Susan Good says:

      We are twins! I do not care for roses or glads, either! I can go within, too. It does not mean I am not a worthy friend. I am and enjoy women. Friendships like flowers need to be cultivated. A never ending responsibility. I don’t have the time to daily nurture others except for my husband and my pooch America and my responsibilities. But when called upon, I am there. Warmly, Honey

  3. Elaine Ness says:

    Dear Honey,

    You have been on my mind and in my mind all day today. This delightful post about flowers touched my heart. What sort of bouquet would I choose? One that is not too ‘studied’ in the sense of rigid and very disciplined, which is what I see in every florist shop here in Ecuador. Flower selections are lined up like soldiers standing at attention. Very off-putting to me. I buy various flowers at the market and arrange them in a random fashion, which makes me smile.

    A brief comment about your current situation: I really do understand where you are right now. I dealt with my husband’s fifteen-year history with Alzheimer’s disease, which ended very suddenly 18 years ago tomorrow. He died within 24 hours due to an infection. It was our 46th anniversary. We had a wonderful marriage. To watch a brilliant mind go in reverse was very hard but I savor some special moments of total lucidity. One evening after dinner, I asked Brad, “Is there anything else you would like?” (At that point he rarely spoke.) He looked right at me and with total clarity he said, “I. want. chocolate!” which I delivered.

    I was able to care for him at home until two weeks before he passed away. He did not know who I was during the last two years but I knew who he was. I am grateful he did not have pain and he remained cheerful.

    So please remember that you have become dear to me and I pray for your well-being and Sheldon’s also.

    • Susan Good says:

      Dear Elaine, You make me cry. You will always be in my flower arrangement. You are dear to me. Warmly, Honey

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