How to Bloom After 50April 8, 2018
The word reinvention is on my mind because it seems to be the ‘in’ word in many articles written for women over 50. I read and listen to experts telling us that learning how to bloom after 50 is all about reinvention.
If we reinvent ourselves, we will find a new meaning of happiness that ultimately will lead to a more fulfilling life. How depressing and unrealistic is that?
Reinvent means, via New Oxford American Dictionary: “Change yourself so much that it appears you are entirely new.”
Hopefully by the time you are over 50 you have a positive feeling about who you are and don’t want to reinvent yourself. My God, you have spent 50 plus years becoming the woman you are. Rejoice.
How to Bloom After 50: Let’s change our mindset
A far better word would be, ‘reopen.’ It resonates with positivity. It acknowledges that you have the opportunity to reopen possibilities because you have time and you are a wiser woman after 50. It is telling you, not to get stuck because you are an empty nester, a divorcee, a widow, retired, or living with a retired husband that changes your lifestyle. Now, because of your age and wisdom, you have tools to continue to bloom.
DARLINGS, WE WANT TO REOPEN OUR MINDSET TO ALL POSSIBILITIES THAT MAKE US HAPPY
I am of the mindset that we continuously grow intellectually and emotionally as long as we live on this earth.
Our wealth of experiences is vast. We marry, we give birth, we raise children, we own our home, we learn about people, and we move. Some of us have careers, become grandmothers, care for our elderly parents. Still others are divorcees, widows, we remarry, have blended families and a million other life experiences.
Each experience adds layer upon layer of self- growth, and by the time we are over 50 years old, we have earned our Ph.D., In life. At this stage in our lives, we know who we are. Women over 50 know what we like, we know what we want. And, we know our flaws and weaknesses, as well as our strengths and frailties.
We know what brings us joy; what brings us contentment; we are grounded, women. So, why in the world would we want to reinvent ourselves when we have worked years to become the women we are today over 50, 60, 70, 80, 90 and beyond?!
How to Bloom After 50: Stay visible!
DON’T BECOME INVISIBLE
I think the major crisis women face in later life, aside from the horrific loss of a spouse or financial security or illness, is the loss of our youth; especially our looks.
This is normal.
We want to have firm arms and thighs, thick hair and brows, a young face and the agility to continue with prowess all physical activities.
This can be an emotionally dangerous time for women over 50 who begin to feel physically invisible. Feeling invisible leads to depression, and for some women, total emotional withdrawal or shut down for the rest of their lives.
How to Bloom After 50: That a-ha moment!
I love the word, reopen. Replace the word reinvention with the word, reopen, then forge ahead and reopen your mind and tap into your strengths and grow. This will be your “a-ha” moment.
Here are a few ideas:
1. Move to an area of the world where the average age is 55+. That is what my close friend, Joyce, did when she realized she felt invisible in New York. She had an a-ha moment! Lucky her, she had the courage to move from New York to Palm Springs where she has now lived happily for more than 20 years.
2. Hire a computer teacher. Learn to text and Skype so you can communicate with your grandchildren so that you can shop online, so you can Google all kind of information, so you can read blogs; so you can email, read books and watch movies and use Facebook.
3. Go back to college for your degree or take art classes at a museum.
4. Learn to play a selection of card games so you can socialize with women your age. (Don’t worry, not all card games end as mine did! Most, I am told, do not.)
5. Travel and explore the world.
6. Join a book and movie club.
7. Buy a dog.
8. Start a group of 8 or 10 women and meet monthly or bi-monthly to discuss as a self -help what you are feeling after the age of 50.
Accept and value yourself. You are accomplished, and you have wisdom. You are women over 50 who get it. Now use it. Bloom where you are planted. I can’t wait to see how you grow.
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