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As a woman who has lived through many passages and learned through my larger than life experiences (positive and negative), I’ve discovered how to take a big empowering bite out of life.

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Balance or Burst? 5 Ways to Embrace Balance

Daydreaming as I wait for a table in the long line at the Original Pancake House, I am feeling calm for the first time in two weeks.

At that moment I think to myself, “I can hardly believe what I was able to accomplish in the past two weeks, but not without experiencing that gut-wrenching physical and emotional feeling that I was going to burst. This is not good.”

Balance or Burst

Yes, I got everything done—but at what price?  I thought to myself “I am clearly in need of an intervention.” I look down at my red kabbalah string tied around my wrist and realize that while it guards and protects me, it doesn’t have the power to teach me how to live a balanced life. I know it is up to me. God help me!

I have a feeling that many of you are in the same boat to some degree. So many hats we have to wear… and so much tumult in between that jumps out of nowhere!

And as I am deep in thought writing this, I realize I owe e-mails to a dozen people. I have thank-you notes that are piling up, I haven’t confirmed our theatre ticket times, and I have a wedding and birthday gifts to buy. Worst of all—I misplaced my credit card.

Sound familiar?

I want to master the clock and be on top of my responsibilities. Furthermore, I want to stop feeling like I am on overload, and I think many of you are carbon copies of me.

How I’m Taking Back My Life

So what to do?  Here’s what I decided to do—informed by the tried and true common sense I have developed and honed through my long, rich and tumultuous life.

If something can be done in five minutes, I am not going to procrastinate. 

Nike has it right. I’m going to make their mantra—Just Do It—mine. I always want to put the little things off, but they add up. When I let all the little five-minute things pile up, they put me in burst mode, not balance mode.

So instead, I will try and discipline myself and channel the feeling of relief I’ll get from knowing something is done.

Own my choices.

I am going to learn to say, “This will not work out for me.” It will be hard to get out, but it conveys everything. In other words, “I will not let myself fall into martyrdom.” I will feel less beleaguered. I will have more time to do what I need or want to do.

I know I will feel more balanced if I can achieve this goal.

What about physical and mental energy?

A few days ago I had deadlines because I knew my grands were coming for a visit and I didn’t want to cut into my time with them. I’m sure you, too, have deadlines for this or that reason.

Therefore, I will ask myself, “in what part of the day do I have the most mental and physical energy to accomplish what’s most important?”  I am freshest in the morning. The only thing I will do before I start my daily responsibility of writing is making a fresh pot of coffee.

I will resolve to do a few hours of non-stop writing before I take on my the easy tasks, like making phone calls, sending out emails, hitting the treadmill and so on. I know I will feel so much more in balance—and energized—with a new routine where I put the most important things first.

Am I getting to you, dear readers? Are you seeing yourself on a clearer path to achieving balance rather than bursting at the seams?  

I will say to myself, “I can allow myself to quit if I am not fulfilled.” 

If you are not fulfilled, I say quit. Why? We can use the time for something we enjoy, like spending more time with our families.

I will simplify my elective burdens.

My daughter asks me to make my delicious guacamole. I decide I should lighten my load. I thank her for loving my recipe and explain to her I am on overload and will bring my favorite brand of guacamole. My burden will be less, I will have more balance in my life and I will feel good. Makes sense?

Find Balance Where You Can

I know everything cannot be balanced in a day… or even a week or a month. I am a realist. But our days can be more in sync with the few easy ideas I listed. I already feel emotionally and physically better. Now all I have to do is just do it: balance or burst!

Please share your thoughts with me via TwitterFacebookPinterest, Instagram or in the comments section below.

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July 13, 2018

Passages After 50

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  1. Mary Benninghofen says:

    Honey, yes, God will help you if you ask him..what’s important for that day..it is Ok to say No …we worry too much about what others think- be at peace with God, yourself and husband. I enjoy your blog.
    Blessings,
    Mary from St Louis 🙂

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