My goal is to help you create a lifestyle of positivity and possibility. I am smiling!

– Warmly, Honey

Why happiness takes work

I learned very early on in my life, first grade to be exact, that happiness takes work. Of course, as a six-year-old, I did not think of it in those terms, but I just knew the harder I tried to make new friends or get good grades, the happier I felt.

Throughout my life whenever I faced fear, frustration, grief, anger, loss, anxiety or disappointment, I knew that happiness takes work and I worked.

I wanted to write about happiness today but was having trouble defining the word, so I searched the Oxford American Dictionary… they had trouble too!

The dictionary defines happiness as a state of being happy

It seems to me that even the dictionary could not define happiness. Maybe it’s because everyone has their own definition. My definition would be that happiness equals hard work and wisdom.

WISDOM. We have to be wise when we are confronted with unhappiness and not despair. We have to understand that we will have to work hard to get out of our despair. The harder you work, the happier you will be. Makes sense?

HARD WORK. Women wear many hats. We are wives, mothers, daughters, grandmothers, girlfriends and many of us have careers. We have ups and downs in our relationships. Happiness takes hard work. If we work hard at happiness, there is usually a silver lining.

If happiness takes work am I working hard enough?

Now that I have given my spiel on happiness taking work, I was thinking of where I could work harder. Fortunately, I am doing just fine at the moment, except…

MAINTENANCE. My personal maintenance. There are not enough hours in the week to patch, patch, patch.

You know darlings, after a certain age it’s all repair work. There is not a woman over 50 who is not trying to turn back her ‘clock.’

We need time for dental work, varicose veins, skin tags, brown spots, botox, facelifts, liposuction, thinning hair, grey hair, eyebrow wax and color, face wax, leg wax, Restylane, collagen, workouts, bunion surgery, breast lifts, trips to buy the best face creams, body creams, loofahs, bath oils and bras. It never stops! Thank God, I don’t need all the repairs!

I have decided to put most of the patches on the back burner because texting my children and my grands, spending time with my  husband, calling my mother every day, writing my stories, having lunch and gabbing with the girls, paying our bills, marketing, travel, etc. are on the top of my ‘happiness takes work’ list!

I have always felt that a woman’s inner beauty is far more important than her outer beauty, so patch, patch, patch will have to come after love, friendship and responsibilities. That comes from years of wisdom.

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  1. Loving this,! how right you are, the hardest you work the happier you will be Thanks for reminding us????

  2. I totally agree! The saying "Out with the old, in with the new!" should NOT apply to women over 50! We should be happy in our own skins and revel in the fact that we are ALIVE! Regrettably, so many of us didn’t make it to this stage due to disease or fate. We must take heart that we ARE here, we ARE now, we ARE experiencing today! We hope to experience the future! Decide where you want to spend your time and you’ll find your bliss. Cosmetic "adjustments" are only that. They aren’t really us. Our inner beings are, as you so aptly say. And working hard does bring wisdom, joy and happiness as you feel more satisfied with the outcomes! -Allison from SoCal

    1. I love the saying that happiness takes work because it is so true. I teach this to my grands they will always feel relevant and proud of who they are. Warmly, Honey

  3. I love this story. It hit really really hit close to home. I will be turning 65 years old in sept. I love the insights you share with us thank you.

    1. I liked it too. One of my favorites I wrote because we have to work at it everyday. if we realize that to be happy takes work we will feel relevant and visible almost daily. Thank you for liking. Warmly, Honey

  4. This is a very accurate post. Thank you for mentioning all the maintenance it takes to keep up appearances as we age. I see woman comment on how good Susan Lucci and Tina Turner look, but I doubt they understand what is behind those incredible looks. The list you posted is a good part of what it takes to maintain that image, not to mention the discipline. Those women make it look easy, which in itself is work! You are right, there comes a time when some of those things begin to take time away from the really important things in life. Thank goodness our age allows us to choose well.

    1. There are just not enough hours in the day to patch, patch, patch. i am so busy, I forget! That is not good, either. I am smiling. Warmly, Honey

  5. Oh Honey, you make me happy. Thank you for your real life commentary but most especially your light!

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