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As a woman who has lived through many passages and learned through my larger than life experiences (positive and negative), I’ve discovered how to take a big empowering bite out of life.

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Beauty & Style


Passages After 50

Surviving Widowhood

Reinventing Your Look after Losing a Partner or After a Divorce is Key to Getting Your Life Back

Whether it is due to death or due to a divorce, losing a partner is a huge life crisis that is both overwhelming and emotional. Most women have been with a particular partner for years and have grown accustomed to existing with this person, unintentionally losing a bit of their independence. This is normal, and the emotions that come after losing this person are hard to deal with.

After a divorce or death, a woman has to learn how to live by and for herself again. With that comes a number of small things she must do to feel good on her own. Particularly, reinventing her look after a tragic loss will give her a newfound feeling of confidence and empowerment. New Jersey Divorce Attorney, Katherine Wagner commented, “Dealing with the loss of a significant other is challenging and can greatly impact a woman’s self-esteem and confidence. Reinventing yourself after a divorce or death will make you feel more like yourself and will give you the ability to be who you want after this major life crisis.”

Here are some tips on how to reinvent yourself after a loss in a healthy manner:

Determine What You Want to Reassess

It’s important to decide what you want to change before reinventing anything. The idea that you’re going to reinvent all aspects of yourself at one time is unrealistic and will be overwhelming. Pick a few things you want to reassess and make an effort to act on these things.  Determining what you want to reassess could mean something as small as changing your hairstyle or as large as moving to a new space.

Women deal with loss and divorce in all different ways, especially depending on the circumstances of either situation. A common feeling, however, is the want to change something major that is attributed to or reminds you of the person you are no longer with. It’s important to determine what these things are and change them. Determining what you want to reassess will create a plan of action for you and will allow you to get your confidence back.

Focus on Your Style

Often, reinventing yourself can mean reinventing your style. This is a common and healthy desire of women who have just lost a partner. Focusing on your style could mean changing your wardrobe completely or it could mean only altering a few things like what you wear out on a Friday night with friends or dressing more authentic rather than conservative.

Focusing on your personal style will help you gain the confidence you deserve back because it will give you an idea of what you value and the type of person you want to be and how you want to come off to others.

Join a Fitness Class

Joining fitness classes isn’t just useful in order to lose weight; joining a fitness class will keep your body healthy and will help you feel great. Feeling good about yourself physically will boost your confidence and aid in your personal reinvention. Here are some fitness classes to consider:

  • Yoga
  • Spin
  • Weight Lifting
  • Zumba
  • Barre
  • Dance Lessons

These various workout classes are great to keep your body toned and your heart healthy; your physical self will look great while your mental and emotional self will feel great.

Fitness classes are also a great way to meet people; a social aspect that is important after dealing with loss or divorce.


Decluttering is another way to reinvent yourself after a loss or divorce. Decluttering will help you decide what you want and what you don’t want after this major life change and will show you what you want for yourself in the upcoming years, especially in terms of reinventing your look.

Declutter your closet, your bedroom, your garage, your home and even your office in order to gain a sense of relief as well as feelings of independence. Holding onto things can make it hard to get over another person and will inhibit you from becoming the best mental, emotional, and physical self you can be.

Change the Interior of Your Home

Changing the interior of your home is a great way to reinvent your look as well. Building off of the idea of decluttering your life and determining your style, changing the interior of your home is a positive way to reinvent your look because it allows you to make space completely your own. Similarly, changing the interior of your home gives you a project to occupy your mind after or when dealing with a loss.

Find Yourself

Overall, the most important thing to keep in mind when attempting to reinvent yourself is to find yourself and what you value and what you want in life after experiencing death or divorce. For many, this is the first time in a long time that they are able to focus on themselves and their goals. It’s important to keep in mind that you are in control of how you feel and how you react to situations, build your confidence and reinvent not only your look but also your mindset.


Veronica Baxter is a writer, blogger and legal assistant operating out of the greater Philadelphia area.





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January 27, 2020


Reinventing Your Look After Divorce or After Losing a Partner

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  1. Mary Jane says:

    For me, divorce was just like a death. Many people don’t realize that. I was married for 30 yrs…a lifetime. I think it’s so important to take time for yourself. Rediscover who you are and what you want in life. I have now found peace, but it takes time.

  2. Mitzie says:

    I went to college at forty, following my physician husband leaving me. Our years together were spent mostly getting him educated. I went on to get a masters in education and taught for 17 years until retiring four years ago. It was the biggest boost to my confidence that I could have chosen! He wasn’t the only smart one in our family after all!!

  3. Debby says:

    I got divorced after 42 years of marriage. I was never happy and felt I was losing my identification. I didn’t know who I was anymore. Also, my ex was not a ‘worker’and he was always coming to me to bail him out. One day I figured out that if we stayed any longer together I would have nothinging in the end. I knew he wasn’t prepared to look after me, so we took the plunge. It wasn’t easy by a long shot, but the minute I moved out on my own I felt free.
    Many challenges have to be dealt with besides money. My children,my grandchildren ,where to live etc.
    But it all slowly came to gether. I am happy now. I have had a few male friendships, but I felt better to be alone. I am happier now.

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