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As a woman who has lived through many passages and learned through my larger than life experiences (positive and negative), I’ve discovered how to take a big empowering bite out of life.

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My Thoughts on Mankind While Living in Elsewhere

My Thoughts on Mankind While Living in Elsewhere

I have never been short on expressing my feelings. Late yesterday afternoon while in a Yoga pose, my instructor asked me how I was feeling.

“Not as colorful as my Yoga mat, my Indian blankets, and my colorful Yoga straps,” I replied.

My instructor is in his early 40’s. He is also a Tai Chi expert, a physical therapist, and a personal trainer. He sees many people in all age groups. I told him I was feeling strangled from all that was going on around me. Then, I went on to say I had lost hope and trust in mankind… that I was filled with fear, anger, and loss.

“Everyone feels like you do, except the perpetrators,” he replied.

“They do?” I questioned with shock in my voice.

He nodded. “They do. There is no camaraderie, no community. Everyone is suspicious of one another. Mutual trust and friendship are gone. People are afraid. I deal with people of all ages. Your feelings are normal. People just don’t share how they are feeling. You should write about it in your blog so others will realize they are not alone.”

“Good idea,” I replied as I tried my best to do a pose.

Entering a New Stage

It is essential, darling, to let you know that living life in Elsewhere has not stopped me. Not one bit. I am busier than ever. And I am in the process of putting up a new website and expanding www.honeygood.com. Elsewhere has asked me to question the true moral ethics of mankind. So, I ask myself this question: “How am I going to survive happily in a foreign place like Elsewhere?”

I am going through a new stage. Remember, age is just a number. Every new stage we enter requires growing pains. This is all positive growth! Even though we go through some difficulties until we reach our full bloom, I have taken on a big challenge. My feelings about mankind and his treatment of others have shifted. It will never go back to what it was. I will watch my back. And, I will never be as trusting. I will shed people from my life (you know my word, DELETE) without a care, knowing they are not my style. This is all healthy.

However, with this new stage comes a lot of unanswered questions—but all healthy in the long run. Maybe some of you will consider joining me?

All of Our Lives Have Changed in Elsewhere

Darling, the actions and reactions of thousands of Americans of all ages, all colors, all nationalities have left my family from the youngest to the oldest shattered. I feel bad for all of us. What I have witnessed the past twelve months in Elsewhere has had its devastating impact on my view of the human race and I assume, yours too. Like you and your family, we have spent our lives living side-by-side in an ordered community where people share customs, laws, and values. Like you, I believed in people who understood frailties, listened to them, and then gave them the benefit of the doubt—unless they overstepped my boundaries.

I have forgiven and forgotten because I feel it is important to walk in another person’s shoes before reacting to their action. I taught this to my children and my grands. And, I always expressed to them the importance of a kind heart and tried to show them the same. You did also, I am certain.

I Long for the Normalcy That Once Was

The actions of thousands of my countrymen have robbed me of these feelings. Their actions have filled me with anger. How dare they expose their abhorrent behavior in front of my children, my grands, and the rest of the world! They have robbed me of any desire to put my energy into people. They have made me question the human race. And, they have frightened my children and me as we watch abusive verbal and physical attacks on the unsuspecting. I feel I am living in a hellhole. I would give anything to get back what we once called: normalcy.

As I mentioned, I feel strangled because I am being forced to face the reality that mankind is far from good. I have lost hope in ever feeling differently because too many people have said and done too many things that are unbearable. Darling, this forced me to see the writing on the wall.

Where Has Our Moral Code Gone?

Feeling disillusioned results from the discovery that something important to you is not as good as you believed. Feeling this way leaves an empty pit in your stomach. At least it does in mine. Why? Because I am trading in my enthusiasm for disillusionment. I can’t help feeling as I do because the reality is people have traded in their moral code of values (loyalty, empathy, justice, honesty, respect, humility, love, and gratitude) for greed, power, brutality, lack of loyalty, disrespect and zero honor. Don’t get me wrong, I know every person has their blemishes, including me.

Rekindling My Hope

I am sitting at my desk. I just lit a cinnamon-scented red candle. It is still dark outside, the city lights still aglow. I turn my thoughts to people in my small circle and my large circle. And I think of my children and my grands. I think about all of the people I know that are acquaintances and I feel a warmth from the candle and from all of them. Darling, I think of what they have shared with me over the past year over the phone, in text, email, in-person, and on Zoom. They are wonderful human beings.

Finally, I think of you, your comments on my blog, and your engagement with one another on my private Facebook group, GRANDwomen with Moxie. Then, I smile. I treasure all of you in some way. You are my rock at this time because when I think of you, I do feel hope and hopefulness in the goodness of most mankind.

Thank you from the bottom of my heart.

How do you feel about how mankind has evolved over the course of the last year? I would love to hear your thoughts in the comments at the bottom of this page. 

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February 18, 2021

Passages After 50

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  1. Glenda says:

    Honey, you have expressed my feelings exactly! I’m sorry for all of us. I worry about my grands, my adult children, my husband. I’m afraid to look at strangers! I’m afraid for all of us.

    But I do have to say, I receive my 2nd shot and that is good news.

    • Honey Good says:

      See every cloud has a silver lining. You now have protection from the virus! Speak up, speak out and keep abreast of the news. Warmly, Honey

  2. cara says:

    You put it so well Honey. I am known for being smiley faced and upbeat but it doesn’t mean to say I’m unaware of everything that is happening that is so contrary to how I was brought up and that greed and self interest and exploitation to make profit ‘to have a good life’ is now seen as par for the course! But take heart there are so many good kind warm people around as the pandemic has shown us. Amongst all the extremes which is the only thing the media seem to find newsworthy there are still people who strive to make the world a better caring place…

    • Honey Good says:

      Well if they are around why are they silent. Where are good leaders to lead us out of this horror story? Warmly, Honey

  3. Pauline says:

    I feel exactly as you. I have learned to keep my mouth shut when I’m with others. Staying away from social media more. There is so much hate and negativity in our country. No respect for others. The only way to get away from it is to turn off your tv. Don’t listen to the news. I refuse to live in fear. I believe everyone should do what they want and respect what I want. Play music, read books, learn a new skill, mind your own business, take an online class. I’m not sure it will ever be normal again during my life time. Every day we are losing our freedom more. So sad. I choose to be happy but it is harder each day.
    Yesterday i read a comment about the death of a talk show host from cancer. The comment said he was glad this person lived long enough to die from cancer. How sad is that. What happen to if you can’t say something nice don’t say anything.😢

    • Honey Good says:

      I agree with you 100% except for one thing. Don’t shy away from expressing your thoughts. They don’t. Be the lady you are but stand up with pride for our Country and Democracy. I saw many articles about Russ L. a giant of a man who passed away from Lung Cancer. The newspapers and commentators lack total character and kindness.They disgust me. I ask myself, how can they lower themselves to the lowest denominator. And… if they are so unhappy living in a democracy I suggest they buy a one way ticket and move to Venezuela and leave us alone, in peace. Warmly, Honey

  4. Becky Anderson says:

    I believe we mirror what is around us, what we read and hear. Our aloneness this past year has given us the time to observe things we haven’t had the time or taken the time to see. The media’s obsession with politics and my watching and reading daily so I can stay up to date on this fast changing world has shaken me. I am the mayor of a small Kansas community. The ugliness I have observed from those not wanting to wear a mask, or showing a white supremacy side of themselves has been frightening. I try to take a step back and wonder why is this all happening? I feel as mayor I need to listen to all sides and try to see things from their point of view. It can be maddening and exhausting. I am a Christian and I have to remember what Jesus taught us, Love for Everyone. Some days easier than others.

    • Honey Good says:

      Do what you know is right.You will be respected. There is no middle any longer. I truly don’t believe the majority of Americans are against any nationality. We elected a Black President for two terms. This thought that we are a prejudiced Nation is to divide people and start trouble and they have accomplished their goal. They have divided with success a peaceful Nation. Of course there are Whites who do not like Blacks and Blacks who do not like Whites but they are in the minority. As far as masks, there are different views.Some scientists say wear a mask, some say don’t. I wear a mask to protect myself and to show respect for others. I live in the middle of Chicago, downtown, and I rarely if ever see anyone without a mask. When I vote I vote for the party whose policies are my policies. I am an Independent and have voted on both sides of the aisle. I also do not vote for a single man. I vote for a partie’s mandate, its philosophy. I believe in Democracy and law and order and respect for all peoples and my Country. I am shaken to my core what I am witnessing. You are the leader of your community, you were chosen over everyone else. You don’t have to take sides. You have the responsibility to act on what is right. And, I am sure you will. Warmly, Honey

  5. Pat Cashin says:

    Dear Honey,

    I am certainly not as eloquent as you are in expressing my feelings, so I could not have stated how I feel any better than you have here. I am almost 73 years old so I have seen, heard, and witnessed a lot of actions in this world. What I have seen in the last year has bothered me so much. I don’t watch or listen to the news any more. Sometimes I will look at the local news on my phone, but then get so sad because someone has been killed in some violent way or some immoral actions have taken place that would never have been condoned in the past.

    I am a Christian, but I do believe God works in miraculous ways and I know that many people who do not profess to be Christians are moral, loving human beings. Unfortunately, these people are becoming harder and harder to find. I am a moral person and I have raised my children and am helping my grandson understand that some actions that are wrong and are not accepted within our family members. I feel sad that my grandson, and soon to be granddaughter, will be growing up in a world that is much different than even their parents lived in. I have no answers, just a feeling “in the pit of my stomach” as you said. I pray daily for people to change…..

    • Honey Good says:

      We are deep in the throws of a time where the tables can go either way. We are no longer a country in the MIDDLE. It is their way of the highway. I am hopeful good will win over ‘not good.’ America has always been a beacon of light for other countries to follow. Instead, we are following in their shoes. Keep teaching your grandson and keep talking the talk of the importance of Democracy and its gift. Tell your grandson to always take a stand for his beliefs and never fall under the spell of entitlements and the government. Instead be a winner on his own merit with a solid moral code of standards and a drive to pursue his dreams. You will teach him, wisdom. Warmly, Honey

  6. tricia lasek says:

    Feel the same as you. It’s disheartening to say to the least.

    • Honey Good says:

      Yes it is. Stay up to date with all the news and speak your piece. They do! But, of course, do it with facts. Warmly, Honey

  7. L Flanagan says:

    Dear Honey,
    I too have felt very disheartened by the actions of many during this time. My family experienced a significant rift that cut to my very heart (it has since healed) but the wounds are still fresh to me! I have no answers when our leaders have contributed to this problem. Where are the people of virtue and a moral compass? Thank God I have like minded people in my circle of friends. Prayer and avoidance of hate filled media have been the answer for me! Thank you for your blog – it really does make me appreciate your thoughts and words.

    As ever,

    • Honey Good says:

      Our countries leadership has lost sight of the MIDDLE. It is their way or the highway. Think of marriage or motherhood or our friendships with others. If one partner will not take into consideration and respect the feelings and beliefs of the other side, eventually it ends. The divide is so great between Democracy and Socialism or worse, I am hopeful for the sake of all Americans Democracy wins. Younger people feel entitled and want the government to take care of them. This is not the American Way.So, stand up for what you know is right. send books, suggest historical movies. Write your thoughts.Let them feel your pride. Speak up. I do. Warmly, Honey

  8. Virginia says:

    So well verbalized, Honey. It’s like you’re in my head and those who have expressed similar thoughts to me. Please don’t give up hope. Your blog is like a beacon to me and mine.

  9. Leslie Pfeifer says:

    Your thoughts touched me today. I haven’t hugged my children and grands in too long. I feel like the only people out and about are the bad people. I don’t even want to go into San Francisco, my beautiful city by the bay, as I hear what’s happening there. Oakland has been taken over by thugs it seems. Where is the light and the love outside our doors? Children have lost almost a year of school. I feel for them missing their friends, activities and important life events. A 6 year of cannot learn to read on Zoom.
    I too take Yoga, also an exercise class and French all on Zoom. I take care of myself and my husband. I get my second shot next week. Will things change?. I doubt it.
    I’m grateful for my husband, my health and God in my life at this miserable time.

    • Honey Good says:

      We have to make life change by voting for Democracy, standing up for our beliefs and not letting anyone scares us into silence. What is taking place in our Country is a travesty. Power and greed is the message in America instead of home, family, freedom, justice and law and order. In my wildest dreams I never imagined my beautiful America would be taken over by these hateful people. Let’s pray for a leader for justice to appear. Good for you that you are productive and will have your second vaccine any day now. Ten days after you will be able to be out and about and not so isolated. We will count our blessings for our husbands and be grateful that our children are well, have a rood over their head, food on their table and love in their homes. Warmly, Honey

  10. Carolyn says:

    Thank you for your blog. I read it everyday. I am so full of anxiety and fear. Trying to release it through yoga and meditation. The weather in MA is to cold and snowy to go for walks. More stress. When Will this ever end. I have 5 children and 14 grandchildren and one great grandson whom I have yet to meet because I’d Covid. I haven’t seen one daughter snd one son in over a year. I miss them all so much. Life is not easy. I am 70 years old and I have so much more living to do. I read a lot but then other days can’t concentrate. I am trying to get an appointment now to be vaccinated but even that is stressful. Why is everything so difficult. I am divorced, so the evenings get very lonely snd sometimes scary. Please continue writing. I have started many journals but always land shredding them up. Silly but don’t want someone reading my negative thoughts when I am gone. I am trying so hard to be positive and have hope but I also have a grandson with brain cancer and another with severe speech problems. How can GOD let children suffer ?????? I am sorry for being so down but this is my life at the moment. Please pray for me and many others who are less fortunate than you. Thank you

    • Honey Good says:

      Unfortunately, no one goes through life without loss. I have a granddaughter age 2 who will never know her mother. Her mommy died of Ovarian Cancer a year ago. My grandson is raising her, alone. My other granddaughter, in her early 20’s had thyroid Cancer a year ago and her father, my daughter’s husband and the mother of my granddaughter just survived within the last month aggressive Prostate Cancer. How can God…I agree with you, how can he? You have every right to be down. You are lonely and sad and fearful like we all are. I have not seen my children in a year and I have 26 grandchildren all over America. Everyone in the world is experiencing difficulty. I am grateful that my family is well, that they have a roof over their head,food on their table and love in their homes.That is what keeps me positive..gratitude. I know you have reasons to be grateful, too. Don’t be afraid of the vaccine. I have had both of my mine, no reaction and it makes you feel hopeful that a normal life will soon return. Warmly, Honey

  11. Karen Whitaker says:

    I have lost my faith in mankind as well. I believe in God. I have been putting my faith and trust in Him before the pandemic. The world I have seen in the past year had increased my faith. I believe our only hope is to pray for each other.

  12. January Roskelly says:

    Like you I am struggling….In my mind the words “This too shall pass” looks like “This too shall pass?”

    • Honey Good says:

      We are struggling because we see the writing on the wall.. We are realistic about what is taking place in America. I cannot say, this too shall pass without a question mark. I hope I am wrong. Warmly, Honey

  13. Lynn Burns says:

    Hello Honey!

    My friend in Tampa, FL emailed me a photo of gift she purchased. She sent me this website and I loved it and thought you would too….since they have paperweights! Enjoy!



    • Honey Good says:

      I did visit the site. It is charming. Thank you for sharing. I loved the sunshine paperweight. Have a nice day. Warmly, Honey

  14. Vicki says:

    Yes. I feel very much as you have described. It has been and continues to be disheartening to learn that ones I love or consider to be friends have views, opinions, and have even voted differently than me. I am disappointed and afraid. I can’t find my place or strength: I avoid confrontation, fear alienation, and beyond voting my conscience, I don’t know what I can do to make a difference. Thank you for your uplifting posts; I’m comforted knowing that I’m not the only one.

    • Honey Good says:

      Your feelings are normal. Everyone has lost their enthusiasm. Spend time with people who have your views and are positive.That should give you immediate relief. That is what I would do. Take care. Warmly, Honey

    • Honey Good says:

      You can speak up like a lady. Everything you will say has merit. Everything they say is against our way of life in The United States for the last 400 years. And, if they talk about prejudice against blacks, very quiet look them in the eye and say, “The Democrates, the wealthy landowners in the South were the party of Slavery and the Ku Klux Klan. They were the cruel Masters who created the Black man cruelly.There was no Republican Party. Abraham Lincoln was the first Republican President who ended slavery.” It is a fact. You are not fighting. You are teaching them a lesson. So you can do other things beside voting, all in a lady like voice. Sending friendship and God Bless America. Warmly, Honey

  15. Emma Benz says:

    love to read your well written and beautiful blog

  16. Honey Good says:

    Thank you so much, Cameron! Warmly, Honey

  17. I got too much interesting stuff on your blog. I guess I am not the only one having all the enjoyment here! Keep up the good work.

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