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HOW TO MAINTAIN YOUR MENTAL HEALTH THROUGH A DIVORCE

fasionable woman with gray hair smiling with her dog

by SUSAN “HONEY” GOOD

Whether you have been married for less than five years or more than twenty years, divorce is extremely taxing. You are ending a once important aspect of your life, and that can be overwhelming especially when it’s a long-drawn-out process. This is why you have to protect your mental health throughout the divorce process and after.

Awareness of how divorce can impact your mental health is crucial, as recognizing these effects is the first step toward making healthier choices and seeking support.

While it’s normal to struggle to get to a happier place, don’t let your overall health fall by the wayside. In order to better your mental health, you have to first learn to manage it, so here are some useful tips designed to help you improve mental health through a divorce and beyond.

Remember, World Mental Health Day on October 10 serves as a global reminder that mental health matters, and seeking support is always encouraged.

Understanding the Challenges of Divorce

Divorce is one of life’s most challenging transitions, and it can deeply affect your mental health. The emotional distress, anxiety, and sense of isolation that often accompany divorce are real and valid. It’s important to remember that the impact of divorce extends beyond just you and your former partner—it can touch your loved ones, including family members and friends, who may also be navigating their own feelings about the changes in your life.

During this time, prioritizing your physical and mental health is essential. Lean on your support system, whether that’s a trusted friend, a family member, or your faith community. Emotional support can make a world of difference, helping you feel connected and less alone. Practicing gratitude, even for small things, can help shift your focus toward positive feelings and new possibilities.

Taking care of your body is just as important as caring for your mind. Regular exercise, such as a daily walk, can help reduce stress and improve your overall health. Make sure you’re getting enough sleep, eating a healthy diet, and staying hydrated—these simple acts can have a big impact on your well-being. It’s also wise to avoid harmful substances like alcohol, which can intensify emotional distress and make it harder to cope.

By nurturing both your physical and mental health, you’ll be better equipped to manage stress, reduce feelings of anxiety, and move forward with resilience. Remember, you’re not alone, and with the right support and self-care, you can improve your mental health and find your way through this difficult chapter.

Focus On Yourself

Before you can start your journey of bettering your overall mental state you have to ask yourself, what do I need? When we go through a traumatic event it can feel natural to put prioritizing your self-care at the bottom of your to-do list. However, it should be one of the main things you focus on.

There is a growing interest in self-care practices as a way to support mental health during challenging times.

During the divorce, you will spend the majority of your time dealing with the process. Take some time to focus on yourself. Self-care can look different for everyone, maybe it could be spending more time on your favorite hobbies or splurging on a spa day. Self-care will help refresh and motivate yourself. For example, even spending 30 minutes a day journaling can make a big difference and get your mind on empowering yourself.

Don’t Forget Your Physical Health

Although we often separate the mind and body, our mental and physical health are tightly intertwined. Physical activity is a great way to help manage and better your mental health. Walking is a simple and effective form of exercise that can be easily incorporated into your daily routine to support mental well-being. Research shows that regular exercise and healthy eating habits can significantly improve mental health. If you’re someone who struggles to stay active because of your daily obligations getting in the way, then create an exercise routine that caters to you.

You don’t need to exercise every day in order to stay active. All you need is to set aside 30-45 minutes every other day. Start Sundays when you have an off day to ensure you begin establishing healthy habits. What you eat also plays a crucial role in supporting your mental health, so try to choose nutritious foods as part of your daily routine. Use your physical activity as a positive outlet for any pent-up frustrations that you’re experiencing. Once you find a schedule that works for you, the journey and everything else will feel achievable.

Avoiding Unhealthy Habits

When life feels overwhelming, it’s easy to slip into unhealthy habits that can undermine your physical and mental health. During a divorce, you might find yourself reaching for comfort foods, skipping regular exercise, or spending too much time in front of screens. While these habits may offer temporary relief, they can increase your risk of mental illness and negatively affect your overall health and well-being.

Instead, try to focus on small acts of self-care that can make a big difference in your daily life. Set simple, achievable goals—like taking a walk each day, trying a new recipe, or making time for quality sleep. Regular exercise not only helps reduce stress but also boosts your mood and self-worth. A balanced, healthy diet and staying hydrated will give you the energy you need to cope with stress and stay focused.

Mindfulness practices such as meditation and yoga can help you manage anxiety and improve your emotional well-being. Even a few minutes of deep breathing exercises can help you feel calmer and more centered. Don’t hesitate to reach out for support from loved ones or seek professional help if you’re struggling—there are many resources and tips available to help you take care of your mental health.

Remember, taking care of yourself isn’t selfish—it’s necessary. By making your physical and mental health a priority, you’ll be better prepared to handle difficult situations, reduce stress, and improve your overall quality of life. Every small effort counts, and over time, these healthy habits will help you feel stronger, more positive, and ready to embrace new possibilities.

You’re Not Alone

Often divorce comes with a feeling of failure causing people to shut down and shut off from their loved ones. However, shutting down and shutting off will only do you more harm than good. You need a support system during and after the divorce process. Having a support system will make recovering from the process feel possible because you have people to lean on during the darker moments. Even if you can’t meet in person, make an effort to stay connected with your support system through technology like video calls, phone calls, or messaging apps.

Humans need connection, and having a shoulder to cry on will make it easier to heal. Strong social connections can positively impact our lives, supporting resilience and helping us cope with stress. Social well being is an important aspect of mental health, especially during divorce, as it influences how we handle emotional challenges and maintain healthy relationships. Your support system will help you let go, and remind you that it does get better even if it has to get worse first.

Seek Help When Needed

Regardless of how many hours you spend on self-care or physical activity, sometimes you just need professional help. If you find that the divorce process is taking a tremendous toll on you and your happiness, don’t wait until you are completely drained to ask for help. There are various treatments available for mental health challenges, including therapy and counseling, which can provide effective support during difficult times. Seeking professional help can be intimidating for many reasons but can be extremely beneficial to getting the pieces of your life back together.

There are also a variety of options like online psychiatry consultations for those seeking treatment virtually due to convenience or if you feel more secure at home. More often than not there are an array of underlying emotions you need to work through and a professional can help you unpack and understand. For those concerned about cost, there are also free resources and support options available to help you cope and maintain your well-being.

It might go against your instinct, but divorce can be a journey of self-love filled with a lot of peaks and valleys. Some days will be easier than others but you are in charge of your journey. Try to stay positive and avoid dwelling on the negativity. Your mental health is a crucial aspect of your well-being, so don’t ever push it aside, instead take control of it. You will be grateful you did in the long run.

Remember:

  1. Focus on yourself-Explore self-care avenues that are right for you.
  2. Don’t forget about your physical health-Physical activity is directly tied to mental health. Find what works for you.
  3. You are not alone-Look to your circle of support.
  4. Seek professional help when needed-Your mental health comes first. Professionals can guide you through the uncertainty and hurt.

If you have something to say about maintaining your mental health through a divorce, let’s talk. Your opinions + feelings matter so much to me. Speak up so that women our age remain visible. We have a responsibility to share our wisdom, wouldn’t you agree? Please share yours in the comments below.

Warmly, Honey

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