I’ve been asked by multiple young people, “How do you maintain such a good and healthy relationship with your husband after so many years?” So, in the new installment of what I like to call “Hear It From Honey: It’s GOOD Advice”, I will talk about how I keep the love alive (and much more) in my relationship.
At the end of the day, a woman is a social creature who finds that being with other people and bringing people together is very gratifying. This is not to say that indeed there are genuine advantages to being alone. We all need our alone time. What women look for and value in their friends are the same qualities they are most proud of or wish were more evident in themselves. It is important to always have women mirror you, then you, them.
We have an assortment of friends; our childhood friends, groups of women who share a common interest from time to time, acquaintances who add spice to our lives, and genuine friendships that enhance our lives in several different ways. But, at the end of each day, there is no better friend than the person we share our life with, our partner, our main squeeze. How do we maintain the most important of important relationships when there is a multitude of life interferences swirling around? How do we continue to feel vigorous, curious, and passionate together as a couple?
We work at it, darling, we work at it.
Ask Yourself, Honestly…
Have you stopped giving hugs and back rubs when they are needed? Do you keep your partner’s chin up and give a hand when needed? Are you honest with your partner when you are feeling vulnerable? Darling, do you stay in touch with your partner with texts or phone calls during the day? How often do you tell your partner, “I love you?” Have you stopped having sex and sleeping naked? Do you put your partner before everyone and everything? Or do you spritz yourself with your favorite perfume?
Your Goal: We’ll Grow Closer As We Get Older
Of course, every relationship comes with a price. You know that two people who love one another cannot agree on everything. But that does not mean you stop connecting. Connecting creates a bond in many meaningful ways. Therefore, do not let your relationship get stale, keep adventure and curiosity in the limelight. Aspire together and plan outings and trips and nights to the opera and theatre. Plant a garden together. Get tattoos together. Carve your initials in a tree trunk on a hike or bike ride together. Buy a new piece of art together. Take a course or read the same book and have discussions together. Remember the partners that play together, stay together. Having a deep connection with your soulmate constitutes a healthy relationship.
A Constant Commitment Is An Important Key
There is no one secret to a lasting relationship. It comes easier to some, though never perfectly. All couples have bumps in the road. Therefore, on the emotional side be a kind, patient, respectful, encouraging, humorous, positive, forgiving, and empathetic partner. Love without reservation, sleep naked, declare, “I love you” at least once a day, dress for your partner, spritz yourself with his favorite perfume, and don’t forget the ultimate closeness, sex.
Relationships Are Not Alike
I know that every relationship is unique; that relationships are ever-changing and evolving. Some relationships prioritize their independence, allowing each partner the necessary space they require. Other partners thrive in a complete intertwining of their other’s lives. And still, others find a new love later in life and know what they need and what they want.
Love Is The Most Powerful of Human Bonds
It is 4:57 a.m. and it is dark outside. The noise of sirens screaming in my beautiful Chicago makes me aware of the loveless thus destructive, Elsewhere. At the moment I am safely tucked away in our little world in our apartment in the sky with my Ultimate Concierge and pooch, America. I love them so. No matter where I am, my Ultimate Concierge is ‘all around me.’ Our relationship is intertwining and a second chance at love; so we knew our needs and did not settle.
We could be sister and brother if our home did not have a bedroom! That is how similar we are. We mirror one another. I am the cream in his coffee and he is the butter on my toast. It is a blessed miracle we met. Our compatibility does not mean we do not have our differences. But our love does conquer all differences and in the final analysis, we find a mutual path.
It Is Never Too Late To Repair a Relationship
I place the responsibility on you, darling, because the woman makes a union. You gather and nest and know-how. Men are hunters and wanderers. It is not in your partner’s DNA. Once you figure out their DNA they will be the butter on your toast! Don’t forget the bedroom! Purchase beautiful linens, a new duvet, put sachets in your lingerie drawers, have a vase filled with fresh flowers, and always play soft music. Entice him with your charm, wit, and femininity. There is no better way to begin a reconnection than in your bedroom.
I recall when I met my Ultimate Concierge for the first time he made a list of what he wanted in a partner. He told me it took him a few years after widowhood to figure out his real needs. On our first date, only a few hours after meeting me for the first time, he told me about his list and went on to say, “You are everything I am looking for in a wife and I am going to marry you!” The #1 item on his list: Physical Attraction.
In the world today, where love has become increasingly disposable, and long-lasting love is rare, it is very important for you and your partner to serve as an inspiration for the younger generation in your family. And, maintaining a connected relationship with your partner above all else should be your priority. Sharing love is a privilege and the ability to show your love is a gift.
You heard it from, Honey! I hope this advice helps you in your relationship. Do you want my GOOD advice? Please comment or email your questions to email@example.com. I would love to hear from you, darling.
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