Happy New Year, Darlings! Wishing you a ‘sweet’ year in 2020. May you delight in satisfying those you love, tackle your dreams and turn them into reality, spread your wisdom to your children and grandchildren, love your spouse, your significant other, and yourself, be captivated, grateful, and explore the world around you, join a group to ward off loneliness, differentiate between your needs and your wants, and have nothing harsh harm you. This is how to start off 2020 with healthy relationships: Be your authentic self!
Connections, Or the Lack Of
Don’t expect a perfect world. People will help you and people will disappoint you. How these disappointments affect you is entirely up to you. I think those of us who listen to our authentic selves have a greater chance of having healthy relationships.
It is hard because we are intertwined with so many connections! Blood connections, marriage connections, work connections, emotional connections, women to women and organizational connections, blended family connections, etc…
I maintain this: To start off 2020 with healthy relationships and connections, you must be your authentic self.
I often speak of loneliness. Loneliness does not mean one is necessarily alone. A woman can be in a marriage and be lonely or in a large group and feel lonely. And, of course, there are those who live alone and feel utterly lonely for connections. Whether you are in a lonely relationship or are physically alone, please reach out for help or make a change in your life in 2020. I realize this is difficult, but difficulty is a part of everyone’s life.
If you want to fight your loneliness and find happiness, you have to be proactive and take a straightforward approach. First, try to find an accommodating group, person, organization or even a family member for assistance and companionship. You can also write to me at email@example.com. Rest assured, all names will be kept private.
Do You Trust Your Judgement?
The first question that comes to my mind when I decided to write on the topic of how to start off 2020 with healthy relationships is this: Do you trust your own judgment? While you might be fooled occasionally, you can only judge others well when you know your authentic self. Then you will be more able to accept or turn away relationships that are not ‘sweet’ because you are able to make wise choices for your personal happiness… So be true to you and discover your authentic self.
Different Types of Relationships In 2020
I love being with girlfriends of all ages and all walks of life. I feel as if many of my girlfriends are a part of my family. As I always say, “Women need women.” My happiest and most gratifying relationships are with women of all ages who have similar values and personal qualities. In other words, we are on the same page, we mirror one another, but we also share a bit of sass and wisdom that I find appealing.
I will admit that I have been fooled on more than one occasion by women who I thought were my friends. It saddened me each time to learn these women were not true friends. I often question if perhaps I am a bit naive because I grew up in Kankakee by the Sea. You know the saying, “You can take the girl out of the small town, but you can’t take the small town out of the girl.” That is me, Darlings, and I like it just fine. I have, however, been surprised and stung more than a few times.
My last sting was a short time ago. I asked a friend of mine a question. She told me she could not tell me something that was important to me. I understood when she explained the reason. Nevertheless, it upset me. I was authentic and told her so. I was hoping she would call me the next day, tell me she felt bad, or that she was not allowed to call me, but I never heard from her.
Our family makes us feel safe and connected. We depend on our family during tough times for support. It is very important to build family relationships. We have an emotional bond with our families that keeps us balanced when there is strife in our lives.
As grandmothers, we know that healthy families teach our grandchildren about relationships. If our grands grow up in a healthy, loving environment, it is my contention that they will be able to form better bonds outside their home. They will also see and feel the importance of building trust as they observe both the good and bad times together as a family. They will see conflicts in their family and hopefully respectful ways to resolve the problems. Loving family members help their children and grandchildren become confident in life. My grandparents, aunts, and uncles had a significant effect on my life in this area.
If there is a great deal of strife in your family, there are ways to start off the year 2020 with healthy relationships. Lead by example. You are the Matriarch. When there is a crisis, see it as an opportunity to mend the fences through open, honest and ‘safe’ communication. Be approachable. Have empathy. Be authentic. Allow yourself to be vulnerable. Compromise and focus on the well-being of the family unit.
If your help is denied and your adult children or grands are not open and respectful, do the next best thing: Accept what you cannot change, but always leave the door open…
The Importance of Human Relationships
Human relationships are important for our overall well being. People can suffer from anxiety and depression when they are detached. We are, after all, social creatures living in communities and societies. We are constantly interacting with our families and others in a set system. Therefore, it is necessary for us to start out in 2020 with healthy relationships. If you should forgive, forgive. This is a blessing you give yourself. If you must accept a person asking for forgiveness, accept. This, too, is a blessing you are giving yourself. If you are lonely and depressed, force yourself to get assistance.
And, don’t forget to pamper your authentic self…
Wear bright red lipstick or your own favorite color.
Splash on your favorite perfume.
Light your favorite scented candle while putting on your make-up.
Buy a bouquet of flowers for your desk.
Listen to your favorite music.
Create a special space to be alone to enjoy the quiet of the day.
BE AN AUTHENTIC WOMAN!!!