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How to Remain Visible & Bloom After 50

How to Remain Visible & Bloom After 50

My ultimate concierge and I are in New York, the center of the Universe. I love New York. What is not to love? It is the Big Apple!

We are in New York for pleasure and business. We will have dinner with friends and grands, go to the theatre and visit museums, have romantic dinners and take care of “our” business.

I understand my husband having business but me? Business? If anyone had told me when I was a little girl growing up in the small town of Kankakee by the Sea, I would have business meetings in NY in my lifetime, I would have been surprised that they pertained to business but not surprised that I would always lead a visible and exciting life.

After all, my mother was my role model. My mother explored every opportunity that came her way. I know no other way to live my life. I feel more visible on an emotional level than I have ever felt in my life. Why? Because I am a productive woman who is interested in life and loving every minute of it.

Be a Bloomer

After the ages of 50 and 55 and 60+, we are so lucky to finally swerve off our course of child-rearing, family homes that take enormous upkeep and time, and career responsibilities that eat up 8 hours of our day.

This is not the time to fall into a rut. It is quite the opposite. It is your time to grow.  Darlings, count your blessing. Now is the time to tap deeply into ‘new’ thoughts.

“A Woman is the Age She Deserves.” ~Coco Chanel

Many women over a certain age feel invisible. This is a natural occurrence as we age. We look in the mirror and study our faces and our bodies and no longer love what we see.

We look at our hands and they are not the hands of our youth. In public, we are no longer viewed as a stunner because of our older looks. I have done my research on why women feel invisible and, darlings, it is one word with five letters… LOOKS.

I have chosen ‘the woman’ I want to be at my age. Remember, we are constantly evolving until we decide to stop. So many of you stop, but I don’t want you to be a stopper. I want you to continue to add dimension to your life.

Of course, we are not the same woman we were in our youth. We are better, darlings. We are wiser, gentler and we have the freedom to explore new options and bloom.

Inner Luster

I experience a wonderful sensation that I can best explain as an ‘inner luster. Describing it in this manner, when I walk down the street I feel visible because I am happy and content with my life. I am productive, loved, grateful, curious, and I have that wanderlust for living.

My face has lines. My hands are no longer smooth. I have grey hair. Why am I more content than some of you?

I look inside myself, not outside of myself, for a new purpose at this stage of life.

When you begin to feel invisible I suggest you turn inside yourself to look for ‘your inner luster.’ If you are feeling depressed, it is up to you and only you to pick yourself up and make your plan.

With effort, you can accomplish anything you desire. And, as far as ‘your outer luster’ you can do something about that, too.

It is natural to have butterflies in your tummies when you strike out into unknown territories. It is hard to jump, but just start! Yes, you have to have tenacity, persistence, and perseverance to reach a goal, but oh my, the rewards are worth your effort because you will be happy.

Learning to Play Cards

I recall learning to play cards. After taking a few canasta lessons, I decided I wanted to learn because all the women played. A few of my close friends, known as the big girls, because they were very good card players offered to take me into their canasta game. They taught me well, darlings!

The first time I sat down with them, I was scared. Four hours later, my hands shaking the whole time, I lost $28.00. I was so embarrassed. I drove home, ran into our home close to tears to my ultimate concierge.

“How was the card game?” he asked.

In an alarming voice, I replied, “I lost $28.00. They will never ask me to play again!”

His answer shocked me because I was so naïve but then I got his message and laughed.

He said, “Are you kidding! Next time they will send a limousine for you!”

They did not send a limo, but they continued to ask me to play and… I did. And, I continued to lose but I learned and now I can sit down comfortably at any canasta table and have a great time. My hands no longer shake.

If You Want to Bloom… Act!

  1. Never leave home without a splash of your favorite perfume. It is uplifting.
  2. Never leave home without lipstick.
  3. Define your colors.
  4. Facelifts are tricky. Fillers are great but not to make big lips!
  5. The best thing you own is your smile.
  6. Simplicity is elegance.
  7. Dress your age. Stay away from fads.
  8. Your hair is your crowning glory.
  9. Work out.

So my darlings, the very important word, choice, comes into play. If you desire to learn and grow, you have to act on selecting what you want out of the next several years of your life and then make the decision to go through the growing pains.

Here are two more choices. You can bloom and be visible or live out the rest of your life feeling invisible. So which do you choose?

Share your thoughts with me via TwitterFacebookPinterest, Instagram or in the comments section below.

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  1. I enjoy you and your insights as well as all you share. What you posted today about visibility over fifty was good advice for extroverts. I’m an introvert, and being ‘out there’ is not at all comfortable. I’ve lived my life preferring to be in supporting roles in my career rather than the one in the limelight. Feeling invisible can be very freeing, I find. The only person I want to please is myself in the sense of feeling confident and interesting both in my ensembles and my conversation. Being convinced that nobody is paying attention to me means that I can experiment, have fun, and glide through life as my own person. Please continue to tell your readers that they needn’t be limited by the bondage of age appropriateness. Feeling invisible means you can experiment and strut your stuff … and get lots of spontaneous compliments.

    Thanks for being you.

    1. You are very wise and a very visible woman. My point was this: Visibility comes from within. You can be a visible introvert and an invisible extrovert. Warmly, Honey

    1. It is very important to be involved in life, staying relevant by finding joy in things we accomplish. Warmly, Honey

  2. uplifting colum but why did CoCo Channel hate so many of us? We need to turn her into a better role model.

    1. Enjoy her style, her creativity, her abilities. I do not think she disliked women. She let us know her thoughts to make us think. Warmly, Honey

    1. It is never too late. It is up to each person. Some women stop blooming when they are years younger than you. So bloom, bloom, bloom.

    2. Absolutely! Age is just a number. If you want to say visible and bloom, you can do just that. Warmly, Honey

  3. Thank you for your inspiration. I am confident we would be friends if we lived closer. Our philosophies are similar. I also learn from you and thank you for reminding me how beautifully joyful life can be.
    Warm regards,

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