BEES DO IT … BIRDS DO IT

The most intimate form of communication is in bed. 

The question is: “How can you be intimate with your partner when you are dealing with unpleasant and negative feelings? They may be both emotional or physical?” 

I still recall a conversation with my mom on my wedding day. My mother told me, “The most intimate form of communication is in bed. There will be times you are not in the mood. My advice is to not turn your husband away. And remember the best way of making up is to lure him into your bed.” She was right!

It is amazing how hurt or angry feelings disappear after a night in the hay!

Now is the time you can get what you want! The next morning, plead with him to visit a marriage counselor. If he objects tell him you are going alone. Remember that if it can’t be a shared experience, it can be your experience. Your goal is to reach a resolution because nothing is more important than personal happiness. When your cup is full others feel it and reap the benefits with you.

A PURPOSE

When you married you made a commitment to one another. You had a whirlwind courtship. But after a long time together some days feel like a century instead of how they used to feel … like a second.

When you or your once soulmate no longer feel committed and attached, you lose your spark. Everyone does. But with purpose, you will retrieve it.

So, you must ask yourself what is the major problem causing the strain. Could it be you? 

Could the strain in your marriage be due to emotional feelings? Or perhaps to a physical problem such as menopause? Ask yourself how you can once again make your day feel like a second rather than a century by facing the music head-on.

EMOTIONAL UNHAPPINESS – MY PLAN

If I were emotionally unhappy I would think about my options and make a plan. If I decided to stay put in my marriage I would pivot. I would commit myself to making my life as joyful as possible. 

I would pursue a personal dream. Or commit myself to a group of women friends or a charity I held dear to my heart. Perhaps travel with a friend or solo. I would use all my resources to commit myself to something that brought me personal joy.  Your mate will feel the change in you and this may spark a positive nerve in him!

PHYSICAL UNHAPPINESS – MY PLAN

Next, I will share my plan if my problem was physical. I would visit my gynecologist to confront it and solve it. She would guide me through menopause or other physical problems. I would communicate with my husband how I  felt and relay my plan. To begin, I would tell to him I am physically attracted to him remembering what my mother told me! Every man wants adoration, and it all begins in the bedroom.

The question remains if Bees do it … Birds do it …Why is it so hard for so many couples to do it … to stay in love? I believe that love does conquer all. Love nurtures, communicates, supports, and protects us from danger. It regenerates and uplifts us when our spirits are low. It is the most important facet in life. Yet it has so many sides to it. It is worth all our energy to salvage what once was …to love and be loved …how does it go astray? Circumstances, I suppose but  I just don’t know.

To conclude, it is my hope that you will find contentment and happiness, no matter your situation. You deserve it and don’t forget that for one moment. Without question, you are worth it.