We are on this earth to connect. Socializing is an unwritten law, a ritual we cannot live without.
For most of us, the first task of the day includes performing the simple ritual of brewing a pot of coffee. I walk into our kitchen and open the cabinet to take out the jar of freshly-ground coffee. Opening up another cabinet and gaze at the assortment of mugs in all shapes, sizes, and colors that my ultimate concierge and I have chosen together on our worldly travels.
This ritual clears my mind with purpose and elicits my first feelings of enthusiasm. I ask myself which mugs I feel like taking out of the cabinet to fill up with freshly-brewed coffee for myself and Shelly. I choose for myself the flowered Monet cup from Monet’s garden and take out a masculine cup in black and white that reads The Met in bold print for my ultimate concierge.
Meeting Up for Coffee
This is my first social ritual of the day. I am not thinking about me, I am thinking about us. I feel a rush of love and enthusiasm as I anticipate sharing a cup of coffee with my husband. This social act, the ritual of ‘coffee for two’ with my husband, extends to relationships with our friends and acquaintances over cups of freshly-brewed coffee.
A shared morning cup of coffee with other women is the connector that can start an important social ritual: a weekly or monthly meet-up or online group. Let’s meet for coffee in person or over the internet is often used as a metaphor for let’s get together to gab about this and that. I want to listen to your opinions, I want to laugh, I want advice. I simply want to share time with other women.
Women Certainly Need Women
I often discuss the fact that women need women. I write about this because I genuinely miss laughing and learning from friends of all ages. Consumed with responsibilities, I put interacting with other women on the back burner.
Last night, I attended the Chicago Association of Realtors’ annual dinner with my ultimate concierge. The highlight of my evening was laughing and sharing conversations with other women, all of them younger. Many I knew and some I met for the first time. My enthusiasm was high all evening because of the exchange of conversation with topics ranging from digital marketing to divorce, we were united and age was just a number. Life experiences and knowledge were the cream in our coffee!
Riding home with my ultimate concierge close beside me in the taxi–I don’t take Ubers, darlings because I support my beautiful Chicago taxi drivers–it hit me my husband was the oldest man in the room and the Icon of Chicago Real Estate in everyone’s mind. His ability to impart his wisdom to young realtors of all ages awarded him his title.
Continue Learning From Everyone
So many women over 50+ let their chronological age define them. The pressures for women, young and older, to look younger and more beautiful is heaped upon us through the media. Perfect images of women with airbrushed skin are not good for any woman’s self-esteem.
Spending time without a tribe of wonderful and supportive women in your life is not good for the soul. I am fortunate to have kind friends who support me, my honey bees at Honeygood.com younger and older who teach me and an openness to let women of all walks of life join me in life. My problem is I want more. Time does not allow.
Different Groups for Women
So, I was thinking about a few options to quell my thirst. I want to create a situation where, over a cup of coffee or tea or hot water with lemon, we can share girly information.
The idea of weekly ‘Coffee Group’ on Facebook Live, Wednesday Coffee with Honey, crossed my mind. I was thinking about having an advice column on HoneyGood.com, and on Instagram through #goodadvice where you could send in questions and I would answer them individually and try and figure out a method for many women to offer you advice. I do have my start-up group, HoneyGoodNetwork.com that still needs technical improvement, but I have my Ambassador, Susan Berman Hammer firstname.lastname@example.org at your beckon call to help you sign-up if you have problems. There are already over 300 women in groups of all kinds sharing with one another. All of this is free.
My goal is to selfishly spend time with you because it will make me so happy and hopefully keep you feeling happy, grateful and young as well. And to think this story became reality because I opened my kitchen cabinet to prepare my daily ritual of making coffee.