With Valentine’s Day only a few days away, we think of our loved ones, our partners, grandchildren, and other family members and shower them with tokens of love.
I wonder if you think of remembering your closest and longest-lasting friendships. And what about friendships you value?
I believe, especially after 50, these friendships can only enhance your life because girlfriends increase your sense of belonging and purpose. You no longer feel as invisible or lonely when you communicate with a dear friend. Wouldn’t it be nice to remember them on this Valentine’s Day?
Before the virus disrupted all of our lives, we led a socially active and normal existence. This is no longer the case. But we can be resolute, determined, and unwavering and find joy in our lives. One of the best cures is… a strong relationship with a best girlfriend.
This morning as I sit at my keyboard, I recall a brunch I was invited to attend. What made the brunch special was that my place card and my best friend’s were next to each other. Gail and I have been friends since we were six years old. I felt a huge dose of happiness.
MY MORNINGS BEGIN WITH A DAILY DOSE OF HAPPINESS
I begin my day early in the morning when all but the sun is still. She is beginning to rise in the east in all her glory. She makes me very happy almost as much as a best friend.
I am most comfortable writing to you when all is silent in our condo-in-the-sky, except for very soft symphonic music. I especially enjoy listening to Mozart on my Google Nest Hub Max (I LOVE this gadget!). I find total joy in the quiet of the day because I withdraw into my thoughts that I ultimately share with you. Even though I do not know many of you, we share a bond. Friendships are about sharing. I am happy thinking about us.
At 8:00 am I am either in my pilates class or walking my pooch, America. I am a happy camper taking care of my body and taking care of my pooch.
After my class and walk, I find joy in sharing a healthy breakfast with my Ultimate Concierge, Shelly. But there is another very important piece of the puzzle that makes me gloriously happy…
Phone a Friend
Phone calls to one another add joy and magic to each day.
When I hear a Gail’s voice on the other end of the line say, “Hi Honey,” (she always calls me Honey) it is the frosting on the cake. There is no better way to start a day than, talk, talk, talk and share intimate feelings with your best friend.
I hope you noticed, darling, I said phone call.
Emails and text messages or any type of social media, where there is no intimate interaction, don’t count.
I have a feeling most of you reach for your cell phone to send an email or text or use Facebook or Messenger.
You dash off an email or text to an old friend, “Let’s have lunch and catch up. We have not talked in ages. When are you available?” There is no consistency. Or you think to call and decide to call later but then you forget.
Look what you are missing in life. You could boost your happiness and hers. You could reduce your stress and hers. And, you could help one another cope. This is a way to give a valentines to both of you.
Let’s be honest with ourselves. The phone still counts!
You are aware everyone has the need for emotional connections. But do you ‘remember’ that the best way to connect is either in a phone call or video call like Zoom (or, again, on my favorite tech gadget, the Google Nest Hub Max.) Strong bonds occur through verbal and visual interactions.
Emails and texting will never be the best way to sharing your private feelings with your closest girlfriend(s).
Me and Gail
My best friend Gail and I share joys, fears, wish lists, and problems and ask each other for advice on all subjects. From where did you buy your new bras to a simple and succinct “I need help.” We laugh, get angry and always forgive and make up. We are always honest with one another because our friendship goes back to our youth. Over the phone, I can hear the expression in her voice. We have intimate conversations.
So darling, pick up your phone and call your oldest and dearest friend(s )and gift her a valentine…your friendship.
Why life-long girlfriends make me happy
I recall sitting next to Gail at brunch made me feel like the luckiest gal in the room. As I picked at my boring egg white vegetable omelet, I thought about our time together. This brought back memories of our youth and long forgotten stories. I thought about the paths our lives took. I thought about our intimacy.
Other Worthwhile Friendships
I’ve been thinking on a broader level about friendship. Many of you do not have a long-standing best friend to call every morning. That should not stop you because…
There are other worthwhile types of friendship. There are value friendships. They play a different role of adding value to your life and vice versa. I have friends of all ages who add value to my life. They are not long-lasting friendships but they are very worthwhile because they provide me with happiness. Consider getting into the routine and starting a daily call. I know they would be glad.
Rise to the occasion. Women need women. It is never too late to start a long-lasting friendship. It will take climbing the stairs. I believe women over 50 crave female companionship. It is time to look at the value of friendship that does not have to be long-term because it is one of the best ways to feel better about yourself and your life. I will be your valentine. Will you be mine?
My Challenge to Your to Increase Your Daily Happiness
Wouldn’t Valentine’s Day be your perfect opportunity to start the lovely routine of a phone call with a best friend? This would become a daily dose of happiness.
More and more research suggests that our social circles keep us mentally well. So, I think keeping your oldest friendships alive by staying connected by phone or Zoom and putting your energy into reconnecting with old friends is ‘the cat’s meow.’
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