My Darlings, I hope you are all having a great week so far. As we approach the weekend, let’s take a moment to be grateful for all that we have and all that we are. Reading your questions to me this week led me to remember how important it is that we start each day with a grateful heart and a smile.
We all go through hardships in life, and sometimes they can seem too much to handle. However, we must remember that we are not alone in our feelings, thoughts, and emotions.
You are visible, my sweet readers. You are part of this community and I see you.
I hope this week’s advice resonates with each and every one of you. I know that I felt a connection toward every person that wrote in this week, as I have experienced all of these hardships. Please know that each question brings me a sense of ownership and love toward each person. I feel so honored that you trust me and confide in me.
If you have a question you would like me to answer, please send them to email@example.com and I will answer them to the best of my ability. Sending you all love, joy and a smile.
Happy New Year. I lost a very good friend this year because of assumptions and lack of communication. It saddens me we won’t be friends again in the New Year. I was hurt and I have been told I hurt her as well. That is why she behaved in the way she did. She was over the top and I decided to not be the one to say sorry for her behavior that a simple conversation could perhaps alter this course we’re on. Writing this down has helped, and I am glad for all the other women friends I am blessed to have in my life. This experience, along with your article has made me resolve that I will not take them for granted and it is wonderful I can be my true self with them.
You answered your own question when you wrote, “A simple conversation could perhaps alter this course we are on.”
Remember, mending a riff of any kind is not a simple conversation and that is what makes it difficult to be the one to say, “Let’s talk.”
If you care, don’t let pride stand in your way. Pick up the phone and ask her to meet you for coffee at Starbucks. You are at a stand-off because neither of you has been able to take that important step. If you are true to yourself, you know how you feel about your friend. If you care don’t let the fear of rejection stand in your way. Make the call.
If she wants to meet you, you know she cares. If she rejects the call, you know you tried and the problem is now hers. Accept this disappointment and enjoy your friendships with women who mirror you and make your heart sing.
Hi. I was laid off in late 2018 and still need to work 5 more years. I’m having a hard time getting rehired especially since I want to change from my previous environmental work to health/wellness. I am almost certified in nutritional therapy and actually will submit an article for your blog! How do I overcome the age-ism and get in the door?
Congratulations on becoming certified in Nutritional Therapy. I am looking forward to reading your submission to Honey Good.
To begin my search for a new job, I would start by researching companies to find the right fit. I am sure there are companies that cater to the woman of our age group. Secondly, if I were in the hiring department I would be very impressed that you went back to school to become certified and in an area you love. That shows staying power and desire.
I would write a short mission statement and have an updated résumé noting your technology skills if they are required. I would dress for the part, wearing a big smile on my face and walk into the office standing tall. Show your confidence and express within the interview that you hope to work in this career forever. Keep me posted.
I feel invisible. I am married, a college graduate, a mother, and a grandmother but I am in a funk. Please help me. I am living with my significant other. One adult child in our combined families is a trouble maker and disrupts the harmony in our combined families. What can I do?
Feeling visible is about a woman’s attitude; basically her self-esteem. So, let’s begin your journey back to being the visible you by starting with the easy part–the outer you. It is a known fact that women after a certain age feel invisible because of their looks. Maybe a new hairstyle? New glasses with tinted lenses? How about joining a gym class or clearing out your closet for a partial new wardrobe. And, begin walking tall when you walk down the street and do it with attitude.
Now for the hard part. You have to believe that you are that capable woman who can be far more visible and relevant in the second half of your life. I call this inner attitude. I will give you a head start by telling you this: I know every woman in her later years has the emotional tools to feel visible. Wisdom and knowledge are your strength. She must not allow moments of apathy to derail her.
So Darling, get down to business and concentrate on the inner you. Here a few ideas:
1. Seek out women who feel good about themselves. They are mentors and their actions will rub off on you!
2. Explore your options. Start doing things that matter to you with a purpose and passion so you can feel relevant. You have the time. Begin to travel, go back to school, help others, start a business, dance to your own drummer. And of course, smile.
All of these ideas will help you feel your visibility–but only you can make it happen.
I have a hard time being grateful because I’ve had to deal with hardship. I read that if I want to feel happy, I have to feel grateful. How can I start when I feel negative about life?
I suggest you make conscious efforts to count your blessings because gratitude is a practice. Gratitude is not monetary. You show your gratitude toward a person you love, a pet you cherish, to mother nature; the sun and moon and stars that shine in the sky, a powerful tree you pass by or a garden of vegetables or flowers you planted. The feeling of appreciation will generate positivity. Reach inside yourself and you will feel the power of gratitude.
We are all GRANDWOMEN with moxie, and we need to stick together. If you have a question for next week, please ask it in the form below.
Ask Honey – Advice For Women Over 50 (January 23)
Ask Honey – Advice For Women Over 50 (January 16)
Ask Honey – Advice for Women Over 50 (January 2)
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DAILY INSPIRATION ON VIBRANCY & VISIBILITY IN LIFE AFTER 50+!