My mother’s wisdom and the legacy I will pass on

April 16, 2017 Published by
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A reflection on my mother’s wisdom on her 96th birthday:

As I drift off to sleep each night, my mind sifts through memories until it settles on something definitive and last night was no different. I was trying to recall a special mother-daughter story I had written to read to you on your 96th birthday.

My whirling thoughts reminded me of my old Rolodex as I searched for a favorite memory. I have thousands of stories stored in my mind, and fortunately, I add more and more because I am blessed to have you.

I love you unconditionally

Through all our high hills of laughter and excitement and our potholes where we sunk into silence, our mother–daughter bond is unbreakable. The chemistry between you and me is fierce, and no matter how angry I have been with you, there has never been a time I did not pick up the phone and say, “Please let’s not argue. I am sorry this is happening to us.” The reason being you are the most important woman in my life. I love you and respect you unconditionally. You are my mother.

My mother’s story

You were born Elaine Barbara Lang on April 14, 1921, under the sign, Aries, the ram. The zodiac sign was an indication of what was to come. You were strong willed, beautiful, popular and bright, graduating from high school at the age of 16. If you were a young woman today, I dare say the Huffington Post would have a different name — The Elaine Post.

Your only bad luck was being born at the wrong time, but that did not stop you from leading a “fabulous” life. You did everything well, not because you were a perfectionist but because you had a tenacity and true grit. You loved life and were eager to explore all facets. I watched you play scrabble, do the daily newspaper crossword, needlepoint, knit and crochet. You learned to play golf and ski and loved to travel. You played bridge, canasta, and mahjong. You were the most devoted wife and last, but not least, you had and still have an impeccable sense of style and a wonderful sense of humor. You are and were my movie star mother.

My Rolodex twirling mind stops on a fitting memory. I remember the day I interviewed you for a story I wrote about the lessons mothers leave their daughters– mother’s wisdom.

My mother’s wisdom and words to live by

Here are your answers I recorded.

  1. CONFIDENCE: If people talk about you, you know you are interesting.
  2. STYLE: A woman’s style is a combination of many things, but 80% is her inner style. That is what makes her beautiful.
  3. SECRETS: A secret is a secret until you tell someone.
  4. CHILDREN: Remember, darling, these two wise quotes: “One mother can take care of 10 children, but 10 children cannot take care of one mother.” “You give your children their roots and then their wings.”
  5. GIRLFRIENDS: Choose friends who have your values, but different interests so you can grow.
  6. SKINCARE: Never use soap on your skin.
  7. CONVERSATION: Talk less and listen more.
  8. AGING GRACEFULLY: Exercise your mind, darling.
  9. SUCCESSFUL MARRIAGE: A woman makes a marriage.
  10.  HEALTH: Be proactive. It will save your life.
  11. CHOOSING A SPOUSE:  Make a list of what you need in a spouse. Stick to it because the most important decision you make in your life is who you choose to marry.
  12. LIVING A HAPPY LIFE: Live in the present. It is a gift.
  13. PERSONAL HAPPINESS: Own your self-respect. Have a purpose. Love much and laugh often.

My mother’s legacy

What a legacy you have bestowed on me, mom. I truly believe that a mother’s role is to leave her children with “wisdom in their heads” not money in their bank account. You have given me that gift, a gift I will carry all the days of my life and pass down to my children and grandchildren.

Everyone in this room looks up to you, loves you and wishes you a wonderful 96th year. Happy Birthday.

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11 Comments

  • Ann says:

    Hello Honey! I appreciate being a part of your universe. However, there is an issue that so far I have not seen you address. I am a mother who adopted children later in life. I’m 67. My son is 27 and about to be married. His fiancé’s mother is 49. Managing the age difference is proving to be a intimidating to me. I am comfortable with who I am and I know what looks good on me. But there is no way I can look the age of the other wedding mom. I can’t be the only one who has faced this. Do you have thoughts on this? Please hurry if you do!! Thanks, Ann. Auspleth@comcast.net

    • Honey Good says:

      I will write a story and address this issue as best I can. It will go up on Friday. I hope that is soon enough. Warmly, Honey

  • Robin says:

    You have a very attractive mother. Sure doesn’t look 96.

    • Honey Good says:

      Thank you Robin. I agree with you. I am going to ask her if she is putting something in her water! Warmly, Honey

  • Dawn Collings says:

    Very touching. Beautiful mother.

  • Jean Skelly says:

    Very nice tribute to your mom. Be thankful that you still have her with you.

    • Honey Good says:

      Hi Jean! I am grateful. I am glad you liked my tribute. As I said, my mother is my best friend. Take care. Warmly, Honey

  • Gladys M says:

    You obviously hit the genetic jackpot. Your mother looks fabulous. You both look fabulous. It’s hard to believe your Mother’s age. Are you sure it’s not a typo? Enjoy reading your website. Nuts4Dogs

    • Honey Good says:

      Thank you Gladys. No, I did not make an error. She is really 96! I am so glad you enjoy reading my musings. Warmly, Honey

  • Akaisha says:

    Beautiful story. Terrific wisdom from your Mother. You both are blessed!

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